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Through friends that my ex partner who is the father to my youngest who has a life shortening condition is being abusive to his mum even in front of his new partner. Hes swearing at his mum being aggressive even when his partner is sat there. I feel so sorry for his mum. His mum had warned his new partner he had a bit of a temper apparently when he has outbursts his new partner just says he shouldn’t do it… I pitty this women because I actually think she thinks she will change him. I got stronger and left after nearly (detail removed by moderator) he doesnt even bother with his son nowadays hes a disgrace. I just feel for his mum and partner as I’ve lived it xx
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Yes, I totally get that! The concern for them, possibly mixed up with lots other emotions? Maybe anger at him for doing this again, frustration at the new woman for thinking she can change him when you couldn’t?
If she’s never been in an abusive relationship before, she’ll fall into all the same traps that we did – not understanding red flags, thinking he will change with her calming and steady influence, hoping for a happy future.
The impotence of knowing that there is nothing you can do to help her or his Mum must be like watching a car crash that you can’t stop.
But there really is nothing you can do to help them.
Perhaps have a chat with whoever told you this and ask them not to tell you any more about him. I know that is hard, for all sorts of reasons. The emotions it stirs up are only reopening old wounds and you really don’t need that.
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