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A very long time ago I was raped. At the time I didn’t report it for too many reasons to mention. I reported it because I was reminded of it when a former friend told me (not my husband this time) that he had groped her. My husband was NFA’d for sexual assault due to lack of evidence although I know well that he has sexually assaulted other women. I doubt they will come forward. It has taken me a long time.
I think the experience led me thinking to allowing my husband’s behaviour. I was looking at what my husband was not doing. He did not behave in the same way as the man who raped me. I wasn’t looking at what he was doing. Although I had doubts, I think the rape has had longer term effects on me.
My murky past is bubbling up and it is terrifying.
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All I can say is very well done. Very brave of you. My husband raped me decades ago and continued through our marriage. I hope one day a brave woman like you corroborates my story and he gets what he deserves. He said it would be my word against his. Well not necessarily. Well done. I hope that part gives you some sort of closure. It’s going to bring back some nasty stuff so don’t be afraid to go to your GP and get some councelling x
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I am sorry, KIP. I remember being shocked when I was told by a legal friend that rape within marriage had been made illegal in England. I had imagined in my naive world that rape was rape, whoever was involved.
I can’t even remember the order of things. That year I broke down mentally. I can’t remember at the moment whether the loony depression set in before or after. I remember feeling increasingly less and less control over my project and under increasing pressure. Then he told me he had the power to stop me using the equipment unless bla bla.
I planned to leave the country, but was called in for an interview regarding funding the project. I got the money and left like a bat out of hell. It wasn’t until I was safely away that I told anyone. I really didn’t put 2 & 2 together. I guess I was too ill to think straight.
My husband has groped me more times than I care to think about. He has used me more as a sex doll than a human being. Yes, the bar was lowered.
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