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    • #29912
      Suntree
      Participant

      For the first time in years I have been able to walk some around places which caused me massive anxiety and not just as a one off. 🙂

      It is amazing. I hoped I could, I had glimpses the old me who used to do this.

      So far three times in a row, I have managed it long may continue. 🙂

      I noticed when I realised I was calm and things were quiet and I wasn’t on hyper alert or scared of the quietness in my head. I actually took a moment to realise I had a quiet head and not the noisy swimming pool head I can get and my heart wasn’t beating like mad or my breaths short.

      I wasn’t forcing on the smile, or feeling as though I was climbing to summit of Mount Everest. I could see everything around me and not feel as though the world was closing in.

      I wasn’t exhausted from looking normal and trying to keep my anxiety under control.

      Instead I was exhausted from just the normal effort of being there and doing stuff, because I could do so much more with the extra energy I had from not trying to let my head and body hijack me. That type of exhausted I can manage 🙂

    • #29913
      Serenity
      Participant

      That’s great, Suntree,

      It’s wonderful when you suddenly realise how you have the strength to do things that beforehand would have been too much for you.

      You’re healing! 💛

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