25th December 2018 at 10:50 pm #69231
With no family living here in the UK. I have been desperately trying to get a refugee since myself and my toddler son flee my violent partner. It is so said that even after women on spousal visa make NI contributions and pay taxes we suffer finding refuge support. I was given only 4 refugees and only one outside the city I live is considering help. I wonder is it is because of the holidays. I will call again on the 27th so that the DV helpline can point me to more refugees because we are near homeless. The helpline said the last resort is to contact social services who is obliged to help, I dnt see this as a good option as it seems as through I have failed as a parent not to have shelter for my child. Please any women with no recourse to public fund share their experiences of getting refuge
25th December 2018 at 11:23 pm #69238IwantmebackParticipant
Hi there, you must be so scared right now, I’ve heard that the police will take a vulnerable woman to refuges in their area, some are run by churches. Most churches have the priest/ minister living on the grounds, chap their door too, they will help you too. The WA national helpline is open 24/7, but you might have to leave a message for call back.
26th December 2018 at 1:39 pm #69272
Thanks @ Iwantmeback, we will try the police and church. Much appreciated.
26th December 2018 at 8:38 am #69249LisaMain Moderator
I just wanted to show you some support. You have done so well to leave your abuser and I am sorry that you are struggling to get in to a refuge. Please do try the helpline. The helpline is open everyday and their are some refuges which will be open over Christmas and New Year too.
Please give them a ring and let us know how you get on. We are all here for you so please keep posting. If you need to leave a message on the helpline they will call you back quickly.
26th December 2018 at 1:43 pm #69273
Thanks so much Lisa, (detail removed by Moderator)I guess the holidays make it so much harder. I will keep calling as I really want to get my life moving as it seems like it has been on a stand still since we left. I have had to live in 3 rented places in (detail removed by moderator) weeks. It is so unsettling but I see light at the end of the tunnel!
26th December 2018 at 12:53 pm #69269freedomtochooseBlocked
It is not much help right now but I should imagine some of this situation is definitely because of the holidays. Unfortunately, I know that around Christmas and New Year is some of the busiest time for refugees as sadly, violence escalates over the season for many.
Failing all else and if you really have to, as someone said – turning up at a police station and asking to see a female DV officer (talk it through with WA if you can) – and they will have to do something.
I was offered only a choice of two refuges. I took the one I was offered straight away. If you have been offered a choice of four, I would accept one at least as quickly as you can.
I’m not sure what you mean by public funds. When we left I had twenty quid, no benefits, and a child. That was it. no money at all. But I did have my child.
26th December 2018 at 1:53 pm #69274
Thanks so much @ftc and happy holidays
True holidays heighten violence because everyone is home so I understand it is a busy time
I will try the option you suggested once I speak with the DV helpline team again.
I have not been offered choices, I was given 4 refugee names to chase after myself and of the four only one even asked me questions but they have not committed to taking us in so its not like I am refusing refuge at.
No recourse public funds means when your immigration status shows you are not British but married to a British citizen so even if you have lived in the UK for a long time and worked and contributed to the economy you still have no access to government funds. Government funds is the money provided to the charities and social services to run the shelters and refuges.
It has nothing to do with your savings and benefits, lol.
I will update you all as I make progress
26th December 2018 at 2:12 pm #69276freedomtochooseBlocked
That sounds very difficult.
As far as I remember there was for me a first stage assessment on the telephone which took absolutely ages. They didn’t say yes straightaway – there was a waiting time and I remember not knowing how long
it would take. Even when they offered refuge it was a couple of hundred miles away and they said if
I could get there for one night (in a hotel or similar) they would meet me in the morning and would
take me in.
I do remember it being a very difficult time. When I got to refuge though, we had a case worker who did honour based violence cases and some of these women were as you say ‘no public funds’.
I don’t know what the present situation is, it may have changed with the cuts but I am fairly sure
they must have an equal opportunities policy – and are not allowed to discriminate against anybody.
At the same time with the cuts it must be ten times harder to go to refuge now as there are fewer space.s I’m so sorry you are having to go throught this. I remember at the time doing a lot of praying as the situation looked impossible for me. But then women like us find the strength. And you are doing so well posting on here.
Wishing you some opportunities and thinking of you going forward
26th December 2018 at 6:07 pm #69286ApricotpoppyParticipant
Hi Mummyconundrum, that is so good that you are out.
We couldn’t go to refuge because of sons age. I do hope you can get in.
I can share what I know about no recourse to public funds. Its very hard as you can’t get tax credits, benefits, housing, even with years of paying taxes. You have to be careful what you apply for so you dont breach your visa conditions. It sounds like you are able to work ? That is how I am going forward working hard step by step. On bad days it is hour by hour.
If your country has an agreement you can get child benefit, and child maintenance from father.
You can get certain legal aid. An immigration lawyer can advise if the DV rule can be used to apply for indefinite leave for you and your son.
Keep talking to WA, see your GP and d.a. trained police. For support and evidence.
I know it can be scary to reach out to services. I put off talking to them too but homelessness is not seen as a bad thing if you escaped a violent partner. You are seen as a good mother protecting your little boy from abuse. Also the local authority has a duty to provide housing if a no recourse child is homeless as a child in need.
I know your priority is a safe place to stay, so hope this is not too much info at this stage.
Keep strong and safe, even on the hardest day it is a far, far better life than before.
Best wishes x
26th December 2018 at 8:34 pm #69302DaisyParticipant
Mc, do try speaking to cab or shelter, or a local law centre regarding your current rights to reside. I hope they can support you to be able to provide the info required to be accepted for benefits and therefore funding for your refuge place.
X x x
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