Loneliness

[Anonymous]

I left my husband a few months ago but have yet to see my grown up children who sided with him. I long to see them but dread this also as I know the pressure to return will start again. I have had no contact now with my husband for a few weeks now. I’m unable to work due to ill health and dread my future struggling financially with no home of my own and having to deal with the fact I broke up our family by leaving.

Because I can’t work the time goes so slowly.

I don’t want a long life as it’s all just so sad, painful and lonely. I suffer from anxiety and depression too. I don’t know how it ever gets better as I just don’t trust anyone. I don’t think I ever will.

[Wants To Help]

Hi Controlled,

Sorry to read that you are feeling this way. I do recall the times where I also felt low and was in the depths of despair with no idea how I would turn my life around. I was on medication for anxiety and depression. I had to reach out to every agency I could to get help and support, and gradually, I got stronger and managed to get some ‘fight’ back in me to carry on. Bit by bit my emotions towards him changed and I managed to start focusing on getting myself back on track and finding a way of getting my life back. I do believe you can too, but it does take time.

Please open up to someone and try and trust them with how you are feeling. If you need to talk to someone tonight then you can try the Samaritans on 116 123. They are a great service for listening and don’t necessarily offer you advice or tell you what you should do. They are totally confidential and you don’t have to give them any of your details. You can give a false name if you want to. I’ve rung them a few times during the early hours of the morning in my times of need and they have been great.

Please keep reaching out x

[TiaMaria]

That sounds absolutely rubbish, I’m so sorry to hear that. But this is a particularly rough time. It hasn’t been long since you left and the feelings must be so raw. Give yourself time to heal. I would encourage you to have a look in your area to see what options are available for counselling/therapy. Talk to your GP about how you are feeling if you can. You don’t have to go through this alone. Do you have friends who can support you?

Also, maybe you could use this time to try and find some new hobbies to help you pass the time.
Reading, gaming, sewing, knitting, puzzles, Netflix, drawing, painting, writing poetry, writing short stories or long stories, setting up a blog…there’s a lot to explore that could help distract you and give you a focus.

[Author]

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