Lonely

[Anonymous]

I’m simply ranting. I am sick to death of being a d****e parent. I have no actual support from my family. My sister criticises me as a parent, tells me Im a bad mum. My mum, offers no support either shes not babysat in nearly a year. All she says is I chose to have a baby. Yes, I effing chose to have a baby. But guess what I didnt choose? That my life would be torn apart by a psychopathic n********t abuser who would crush who I was. Never did I think I would be doing it alone, who the eff signs up for that??? I would of loved to enjoy my pregnancy where I got to bond with my bump instead of being emotionally and physically abused, I would love to remember the early days of my childs life, but guess what I was almost killed. I am thankful I left when my child was too young to remember his abusive father and we havent seen him in years due to him going to prison. But f*****g hell why wont my family give me a break!?!?!?! I am so alone. I have a handful of friends, but they always joke that im emotionally detached and are shocked when I get upset. They say I’m so strong. My mum says I should be over it by now and to stop thinking of the past. Because ofcourse all I do is enjoy reminiscing on the wonderful years with a c**t. I have recently been diagnosed with PTSD and the medication isnt helping and its been a few months. I hate everyone, everything and my life. (I love my son ofcourse). I wish I could smoke copious amounts of cigarettes and drink litres of alcholol but guess what I cant because no one effing babysits for me. I ask them they say no they are tiered. Last time my mum baby sat was because I had a break down and got signed off. F*** Rant Over!!!!

[lover of no contact]

You sound like a wonderful mum to me; there for your baby despite no support and loving your baby so much. That was a horrible thing of your sister to say. I would never say that to anyone and I bet you wouldn’t either.

Its very hard for you that they will not babysit either and give you a well deserved break.

So glad you got it out here. No wonder you’re angry with such lack of practical help and support. And yes you didn’t deserve to have to raise your child alone and it wasn’t your fault he happened to be an abuser and well done to you getting away from him.

Keep posting here for support; its tough having to listen to negativity about ourselves from family members when we’re struggling to rear our kids and keep the show on the road single-handedly.

Your sister and mum should be handing you a medal for how well you’re doing; not putting you down!

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