- This topic has 7 replies, 6 voices, and was last updated 2 years, 3 months ago by Mummyofboys.
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16th December 2021 at 11:48 am #135644Feminista2021Participant
Hello everyone
I’m on the verge of leaving my abusive and violent husband, and taking our young son with me. But I don’t want to rush into this without receiving objective advice and feedback from others.
I need someone to talk to about this in great detail, initially over a live chat. I’m not comfortable being face to face with someone talking about this.
Can anyone direct me to a service that can provide me with the live chat help I need?
(Women’s Aid live chat said they were unbale to help and instead linked me to a website asking for £40 an hour for counselling)
Thanks xx
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16th December 2021 at 12:44 pm #135645Twisted SisterParticipant
Hi Feminista2021
I am sorry for your situation, and well done for the steps you are considering to get out and keep you both safe.
I obviously cannot know what WA chatline were responding to when referring you to counselling, as you have asked here clearly for objective advice in preparation for leaving a violent partner.
I don’t personally know of any chatlines, such as the WA one, and perhaps that was the only option they could find for you? There are other organisations you can speak to though, without meeting face to face.
Depending on your area, it may be worth your looking at this website for ‘servicesin your area’, and calling around them to see if they have any pointers for you, either with objective advice or perhaps knowing of a chatline that you could use? Also, bearing in mind you are after a chatline, you could call services in any area as an online chat facility is accessible the world over isn’t it.
Good luck and keep trying. Keep safe and strength for executing your plan
warmest wishes ts
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16th December 2021 at 12:58 pm #135646KIP.Participant
Victim Support have a chat line and may be able to point you in a good direction. It might be worth contacting your local women’s aid and asking if they have something.
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17th December 2021 at 8:26 am #135684Feminista2021Participant
Victim Support referred me to my local Women’s Aid, who offer no online support apart from an email address for bookings – and my email asking for an online chat hasn’t received a response.
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16th December 2021 at 1:17 pm #135647EyesopeningParticipant
WA chat helped me make my escape plan. They also tell you who your local domestic abuse services are.
Who were able to offer me ongoing support during leaving and referred me to free therapy.
But it depends where you live.
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16th December 2021 at 4:28 pm #135655LisaMain Moderator
Hi Feminista2021,
Welcome to the forum. It’s an important time for you, as you plan to safely leave the abusive relationship, so it’s essential you get the specialist help you need right now. I’m sure the other women here can offer invaluable support and insight into what options you may have and will understand what you are going through.
I’m surprised and disappointed to hear you did not receive the help you needed from our live chat service. Telling you we cannot help and referring you to counselling isn’t the right response as you are looking for practical help and advice to leave the relationship. This is definitely something we help women do on live chat, so apologies again.
As others have stated here, there are other chat services available. Some local domestic abuse services have live chat services. It will be worth finding yours and asking whether they offer this help. You can talk over the phone, in confidence with them as well. It does not have to be face to face. They will not judge or insist on doing anything you do not wish to. They will only do their best to inform you of your options and listen, providing emotional support as well. This is a free service, so use them on-going as you need.
Victim Support can help you be safe leaving the abuse and have a 24 hr live chat service.
Refuge also have a live chat service you may want to try as they specialise in domestic abuse as well.
Hope this helps.Take care,
Lisa
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17th December 2021 at 8:28 am #135685Feminista2021Participant
Refuge were better than Women’s Aid and Victim Support, however their volunteers ultimately fell into the same trap of simply wanting to go through an exit plan straight away rather than understanding my situation in any great detail.
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29th December 2021 at 12:31 pm #136204MummyofboysParticipant
Hello I’m new to the forum I am currently going though the exact same situation so if you even need to talk. I’m here x
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