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    • #97337
      fizzylem
      Participant

      Are you an empath?

      I watched a video last night on youtube and every word spoke to me, was my truth. Thinking it might also help others trying to make sense of things. Put ‘the empath and the n********t: a dark fairy tale’ into youtube, see what you think, runs for 8 mins x

    • #97358
      lover of no contact
      Participant

      Yep I’m an empath. That’s why my abuser targeted me; they can spot us a mile away by the way we laugh, talk and carry ourselves.

      • #97361
        fizzylem
        Participant

        We like to give and they just love to take hey! I reached burn out before I stopped giving, when things were going wrong I only tried to give more to try and fix it, thought well what can I do here, there’s always a solution right? It was only because I couldnt physically get out of bed and then started to question why this is in therapy, that I realised how one sided our relationship was – as daft as it sounds, it didn’t enter my head that I needed to feel like I was receiving as well, and he just kept loading me up and I’d do it, I’d take care of everything, in the last year it got really obvious I was being used. I told myself right I’m going to start doing very little if anything for him and see if it turns to sh!t, of course it did because he was not happy about now not having his needs met, but even then he didnt go! As he had a roof over his head a meal on the table. It doesnt bother them does it, openess, honesty, intimacy because they never felt this from the outset. I could never be with someone just because they were a meal ticket but he did and will! Can see he’s gone for another empath and capable woman this time. Never again LONC hey x

    • #97362
      lover of no contact
      Participant

      Mine too, Fizzy, has gone for another Empath who is very capable. Hope she sees through him sooner than I did.

      Yes never again for me too and I’m so grateful I got away.

    • #97399
      diymum@1
      Participant

      Yeh I’m an empath – I watched the video and it made me feel proud to be one tbh. It makes me sad that people take advantage though xx I still don’t really get it xx I do and I don’t I’m just so glad I’m not in the abuser category imagine being a bully – I couldn’t live with myself xx

    • #97526
      teatime
      Participant

      I had two abusive relationships. One of them got very excited when he saw I was an empath. Like he did when he found out I had been abused.
      I am now fairly easily disgusted by people’s responses to anything personal relating to my rather unusual and even eccentric, true self, and don’t tell anyone much. there is something about me that can appear vulnerable. It is just I am quite open and honest, so I kill that for the most part.

    • #97586
      Escapee
      Participant

      I think if I made a video it would be called the depleted empath!

      I’ve got nothing left to give! I’m hoping time and space will top me back up but this time I’ll be checking in with myself and asking if I’m giving too much. I think the relationship has really changed me.

      • #97589
        fizzylem
        Participant

        Yeah feel the same E, got nothing or v little for anyone, can just about manage me and my daughter and not much else. Def taught me that I need to step back, give and take, even if I can, doesn’t mean I should, got to give way to others to give as well hey and if they don’t, its a red flag isn’t it. Can see it’s ok to support someone a bit more than usual if they are going through a difficult patch, but it needs to be just that doesn’t it, a patch, and not one drama to the next and next x

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