29th April 2020 at 1:21 am #102037TobfreeParticipant
I wanted to just ask if other ladies was having abusive partners deliberately
Picking arguements with them accusing them of doing something thats hurt the abusive persons feelings etc and then they are made to feel bad and yet they have done nothing wrong at all
And all they have done was stand up to the abuser
So is this why they get angry and stamp all over us mentally trying to give them selfs excuses to treat us badly and punish us by silent treatment etc so to scare us and get control back
I think we are all feeling more vunerable and having more abuse happening to us not just cos we have disabilitys but because of cov 19 we not able to see our family or friends for support and the abusers know this so up the abuse and it gets more serious and more often
29th April 2020 at 8:15 am #102044KIP.Participant
Yes, even without Covid19 abusers try to isolate us from friends and family so this lockdown is a dream come true for an abuser. They also prefer us trapped and that’s when they become even more abusive when they know we have nowhere to go. You can always talk to the domestic abuse police or women’s aid and there’s the national domestic abuse helpline too x Email chats are available on this site too at certain times x
29th April 2020 at 3:39 pm #102078TobfreeParticipant
Thanks kip for your advise i have a link to womans aid chats i will go on today
He doesnt live with me so thats good yet the mental and emotional and psychologically abuse is so bad its torture and exhausting draining yet at least i can spot it now n know its nothing to do with me and everything to do with him hes a true jekyl and hyde
Yes they love to isolate us from our familys he constantly critizes my family and my invovlvent with them yet then can be seemingly supportive about my relationship with them
And when hes with me i can only see family on his terms and im not allowed to phone them and when i do he punishes me with silent treatment n with holding intermicy etc which is what he does when he thinks ive done something to upset him etc he plays the victim
And the cov 19 is their perfect time to bully us choerse us abuse us as we more vunerable as we cant go see our family or friends
26th May 2020 at 10:24 am #104368HateyouParticipant
I’m in the same relationship with mind games I’ve not seen him since (detail removed by moderator) he stays out all the time n I’ve had enuff off it now he will phone n say who have u got in the house face times me to show him its pathetic he calls me every name under the sun and when he does finally come home I confront him about where hes been and sometimes will just lash out at me he punched me (detail removed by moderator) times in my face a (detail removed by moderator) the next day it was like nothing had happened I spoke to him (detail removed by moderator) on the phone n told him to come n get his stuff out of my house were over and hes still acting like were still together I’m sick of the threats now and the accusations I have 2 children and I know my eldest is really fed up with it all now saying I hope he doesn’t come back
26th May 2020 at 10:27 am #104369HateyouParticipant
Since covid 19 the abuse and name calling has defo gone worse I dont know which way to turn hes took my bank card also and get a single thing for my kids keeps saying I will drop it off hes a very needy attention seeking person and I need rid I just dont know how to go about it
26th May 2020 at 10:44 am #104373IwantmebackParticipant
Keeping someone’s bank card is financial abuse, can you tell your bank he’s got it, won’t give it to you, and get a new one posted out. When we live with abuse thinking outside the box doesn’t happen. Doing this takes back control. You could report it to the police too, you don’t have to charge him, but the more reports they get against the abuser, the more it helps in the future.
He’s enjoying this power and control, take it away from him. If safe enough tell him you’ve reported your card as stolen to your bank, he’ll soon return it then. If it’s not safe, jyst ask the bank fir a replacement.
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