Minimising

[Bechamel]

I’m newly out of a relationship that I never realised was unhealthy until near the end. We spanned (removed by Moderator) years, went through everything together. I know he took advantage of my bad mental state, love bombing, etc. I don’t know how I found ways to explain away all his behaviours. I find it so hard to talk about – I’m trying, I have people around me, but I find myself just subconsciously skipping details, undermining my experiences. I don’t even know why.

I can be honest here, anonymously, it’s a lot worse than I’ve told anyone. The injuries were worse, the things he said were worse, there was SA elements. I really want to tell someone. I have a new therapist, I hope I can tell her. But right now the weight is just massive, I kick myself for minimising but I don’t know how to stop

[Lisa]

Hi,

Thank you for your post. I’m sorry to hear about your situation. Minimising can be part of coping and its how you survived when you were in the abusive relationship. even when out of that situation it can be difficult to unpick that staright away- but its good you are have a therapist and this should be a safe space for you.

You can access free online courses created by or in partnership with therapists specialising in trauma at Bloom. These courses can be accessed in your own time and at your own pace and cover topics such as trauma, abuse and boundaries.

Best Wishes

Lisa

[Author]

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