This topic contains 7 replies, has 4 voices, and was last updated by  maddog 5 months, 3 weeks ago.

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  • #67668

    I fear my ex is after my mother’s money. Apparently our previous financial agreement no longer applies.

    One of my children is like having him around. Darkness. Only darkness. I am taking her to the gp as I think she is very unhappy. I am coping very
    badly with her. She behaves towards me as though I am nothing. No communication, nothing but grunts and put downs. I feel like telling her to live with her dad and I don’t want to see her again. I am not going to do this. She is horrid to me.

    My other daughter has intimated that she is uncomfortable around her father. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what to ask. I understand what she means but I’m not sure she can articulate it.

  • #67670

    Hi maddog, you can bet he’s after the money. I don’t know your circumstances but I would look to getting it moved, if you already have it, before he gets a court order freezing it. Ring Rights for Women and ask what they advise. They cannot advise you to break the law but they can advise you of ways to make it difficult for him to access it. Maybe a trust fund for the kids that you control etc. A property that you all live in etc. If the money is still with the executors then don’t get it paid into an account in your name. Is there anyone you trust? As for your eldest, I went through this but my ex paid for my son to move out. The best thing he could have done. Don’t be afraid to put distance between you. Not sure of her age but without boundaries and consequences, it gets worse.

  • #67671

    This is exactly what happened to m Both senarios. As far as your youngest it depends on her age and maturity. Depends if you have or are getting an order. If she’s younger than nine ten you could go with behavior changes? Acting out, becoming introverted etc xx obviously fear and panic. Eing the ones that make officials sit up xx

  • #67685

    I don’t have any money anyway. Thanks for the reminder KIP of freezing assets. Will speak to executors.

    I took the younger daughter to the gp. I also mentioned the conversation I had with the elder one and that she was worried about something. I don’t know what it is. I do know that my ex left his first wife when I was about the same age as she was and her daughter was about the same age as ours. I do wonder what goes on in his head, whether he hates women full stop, whether he hates everyone or whether it is teenagers he can’t stand, girls or otherwise. There is something wrong.

  • #67688

    I know my ex had huge mummy problems and thought of his dad as a god-like figure. He also told me that he was sexually assaulted by a male group leader as a boy. This he minimised and only ever said about it, oh it was nothing.

    I know abusers come from all sorts of backgrounds with all sorts of histories. I know full well that my ex hates women. He’s told me so many times throughout our relationship.

  • #67689

    It’s funny. My ex first wife kicked him out when their child was (Detail removed by Moderator). Same age as our child when I tried to kick him out. When the abuse began to go off the scale. She must have been much stronger than me. Although I was his next victim and he had me lined up nicely. Good riddance to bad rubbish x

  • #67692

    worth telling your daughter it is fine if she goes to live with her dad.
    Take the risk. It is ok to say that. you have a right to..
    She will soon change her mind
    all best

  • #67703

    My ex had me lined up too. He is quite a lot older than me and I expect I’m too old for him now. I think he prefers at least young’ish flesh and I think the vitriol is partly his age. I doubt very much that your ex’s first wife was any stronger than you KIP, just he was younger.

    I think my younger daughter would have left by now had she wanted to.

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