Moon are you ok?

[White Rose]

I know you were feeling stressed and pressured and unsettled and I wanted to know you and your little one were ok x*x

[Moon]

Hi
Am so sorry haven’t posted for a while been on a rollercoaster and didn’t want to bore you all with my life !
But ….. Am still at refuge went nearer home this wkend so that my little girl could have contact and I attended the cp conference but was a split conference, but I had a voice for the first time and it felt good – was told it was lovely to see me smile and for the first time not look scared.
They have kept her on cp plan as they think he is still controlling me and it’s still too dangerous .
Was a milertary operation for safety for me to leave refuge for few days .
I was so glad to get back today as just wanted to feel safe again.
But I feel I’m doing ok – it’s tough but am hanging in there.
Have noticed changes in my little one and she she was only within dor few days 😢😢

Just want to breathe for a while as was still feeling very controlled

Thank you for your concern
Xx
Hope you are ok too

[White Rose]

Thanks for answering. I was a bit worried!
Sounds as if you’ve had a bleak few days but pleased you found your voice. I’m glad you and your little one are back safe and that you’re both benefiting from life away from the stress.
Is your social worker aware of change in your daughter after the contact?
Keep shining moon!
X*x

[Moon]

Hi WR
No she isn’t aware as only got her back this arvo – she has been whimpering and crying in her sleep and just didn’t want to let me go – I cuddled her and held her hand earlier .
she is sooo angry again – just hope I have done the right thing for her !!!
This is the first time I have been to a meeting and not had repercussions
Not been hurt inside or out tonight !!!
Strange !!
Xx

[White Rose]

Its not strange not to be hurt it’s normal! Remember that and get used to it – it’s your future ☺x*x

[Moon]

If I can keep him out my head then I can see a future – so difficult.
I’ve got my foster dads funeral tomor so have to head back to area … Scary.
Am slowly getting some emotion back aswell !
He wants to have her tomor and it’s scary saying NO!
He knows I will be vulnerable tomorrow so need to keep us both safe xx

[Author]

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