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    • #105416
      Ripon123
      Participant

      Hi ladies,
      Right so I came to terms a while ago that my SO could be emotionally and sexually abusive. But once again I’m so confused if what he’s doing now is abuse.

      So recently I finally found the courage to say no to him when he was trying to pressure me into sexting about a fantasy I’m not okay with. I stuck to my guns and the argument ended with a no still. I have given in previously and felt awful afterwards. After physically threats, threats to leave, threats to kill himself i still said no. He said he’d accepted I was trying to control him and spend the next few days suckling and barely talking to me.

      He now says he never wants to have an intimate relationship with me again. That he can’t be himself so doesn’t feel comfortable touching me or me touching him. This has gone on weeks and is breaking my heart. But he is been so lovely day to day that all the other abuse has stopped. So I’m the happiest I’ve been but the saddest too because it’s all I think about. He mentions sex all day long too. I have tried to be understanding. But he now says he wants to sext about his fantasies I originally said no to, to get more comfortable and maybe he’d want to touch me again. I’ve said no as this feels like a game to pressure me into the things I don’t want to do. I suggested we build back up our intimate relationship. He’s said he doesn’t feel comfortable enough. Don’t know what to do. Scared the pressure will get worst. Or Worried I’m looking too far into things and and I’m actually been awful for not supporting him and thinking the worst when he’s been so nice day to day.
      Thanks in advance 💖

    • #105424
      KIP.
      Participant

      He’s simply changing tactics to wear you down. Being horrible and sulking didn’t get him what he wants so he tries saying he will never be intimate with you again and threatens you, To kill himself because he can’t get his own way! Ridiculous. Next time he threatens suicide then ring an ambulance for him. Pathetic little man. still doesn’t work so he’s being nice now and denying you intimacy because you didn’t do as he asked. It’s like he’s now punishing you but he’s also punishing himself by denying intimacy, these men are so stupid. Any kind of sexual contact has to be mutually consented and never under any kind of pressure or threat. It’s your body and if he wants to force you to do things you’re uncomfortable with then that’s sexual abuse. He sounds dreadful, not caring at all. What kind of a person wants to have sexual contact with someone against their will? Extremely sick. He mention it because he’s looking for a hook from you. Once he realises you won’t back down he will just forget his strop and carry on like nothing has happened.

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