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    • #73946
      alpaca.mum
      Participant

      Hi, I’m new here.
      I’m safe now and have been for a few years but I still constantly feel ‘on edge’
      I’m in a relationship with someone who isn’t abusive at all but I still feel continually haunted by the past.
      I’m receiving therapy and I’m on medication to help with my anxiety but I just can’t get to a place of calm.
      Am I the only one who feels a bit trapped by the past?

    • #73949
      Iwantmeback
      Participant

      Hi and welcone to the forum. It’s nice to read of someone who has gotten out.💛 I think what we go through will always remain a part of us. Reading others posts who’ve left(I’m still at home with him) and also having gobe through sombre bad times as a child, every so often the anxiety raises its ugly head. I’m realising it’s the body’s way of working through what happened to us when it knows we’re strong enough to deal with it. Once it’s been addressed, recognised and put to bed so to speak, we move on.
      Sometimes it takes us unawares, others it hits us like a freight train. Is an anniversary or something due soon or recently passed? that can trigger our body’s defences also.

      Best wishes
      IWMB 💕💕

    • #73968
      alpaca.mum
      Participant

      Firstly I’m Sending you so much love IWMB! Your loved and not alone X*x

      a little bit of it is that my oldest child will be leaving me and going into the big world soon to start her independent life.
      I also think therapy opened up old wounds, the therapist said it’s common to go backwards a little to move forward.
      It’s just impossible to explain why or how. One minute I’m fine and the next I’m off the scale with panic like I’m back there..

    • #73969
      Iwantmeback
      Participant

      Letting our children grow and leave home is very traumatic, more so for us I think than them. I’m happy yours is going on the natural chain of events and not due to circumstances they have no idea of or are able to understand. Both of my children left me to go and live with their dad as their step dad was too much fir them to deal and cope with. At the time I had no idea the relationship was abusive, put it down to hormones, natural rebellion and not doing what you tell me cos you’re not my father scenario.
      It’s true we do to back before we can move on. This is such a happy exciting time in your daughters life, I hope the excitement rubs off on you and helps to take your mind off of what the therapy is opening up. It’s so good knowing there are people out there that understand us even once we’re ‘out’, and that we still need support and encouragement. Fir many it’s that which was missing in our abusive relationships too.
      Take care of yourself, be proud of your achievements and look forward to seeing your daughter grow into a strong, fearless woman.
      IWMB 💕💕

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