14th September 2021 at 9:30 pm #131470Purple21Participant
I’m new to this place and I came because I’m trying to escape this current relationship. Today it’s gone too far he said he is unable to control himself (stop himself having sex with me) he admitted he was going to do this to me without consent.
I’m trying to move on the emotional attachment is strong though so is the abuse. I went to an (detail removed by moderator) because I needed to get out and find new people. He set me up to fail (detail removed by moderator) in one go going at me (detail removed by moderator) I had enjoyed the group though so of course he was disappointed. Then it started the dirty talk he wanted (detail removed by moderator) I didn’t give in. I felt sick. I have (detail removed by moderator) as my previous relationship was a train wreck and he was a predator I had the police arrest him and me moved to a safe home. So I’m on treatment all this person can talk about is how (detail removed by moderator). I have been told he’s not good he’s not safe he has all the wrong intentions and a crime will be committed. I even told the (detail removed by moderator) and they detected he’s very insecure about himself.
I’ve had ptsd episodes with (detail removed by moderator) documentaries starting and I was in bits. He didn’t support me he left me there alone and afraid unable to sleep and I cried to the crisis lines. Then he only is interested in sex and dirty talk. I feel it’s gone to far I am with a therapist but I’m getting out and going to feel so alone as I’m cut off from my family. I know I’m better without this man.
15th September 2021 at 9:04 pm #131502LisaMain Moderator
I’m so sorry to hear that you’re going through this. From what you’ve described your partner sounds very emotionally and sexually abusive, controlling and intimidating. It sounds like incredibly threatening behaviour and I can imagine it is making you feel distressed and low.
It’s very common for abusers to isolate us from friends and family. This (as well as other abusive tactics) creates such a dependancy and familiarity within the relationship that it can make it feel impossible to leave, or to imagine life without the abuser.
I’m glad to hear that you are working things through with your therapist, sometimes it can be a journey to work on recognising the abuse and building self esteem and confidence in order to feel able to walk away, abuse can take a huge toll on these parts of us.
You deserve more than this and support is available if you feel it would be helpful. Are you in touch with your local domestic abuse support service? You can find them here if you would like to reach out to them: https://www.womensaid.org.uk/domestic-abuse-directory/
Take care and keep posting,
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