30th August 2021 at 7:11 pm #130764Brunette3Participant
this stuff is all completely new to me and i really dont know where to start to be honest.
I am debating whether i am in an abusive relationship or no? or whether it is just me?!
if anyone would like to help or chat please feel free to message me as i will be useless on here!
30th August 2021 at 7:23 pm #130765KIP.Participant
Hey, I found it helpful to read other posts and then I realised my ex was behaving in similar abusive ways to other people’s partners. There’s a national domestic abuse helpline which I found great and also reading Living with the Dominator by Pat Craven. Abusers make us feel crazy by their behaviour and for years I thought I was the problem, he would make me feel guilty and blame me constantly. It really leaves us spinning. You can bet he’s the problem.
30th August 2021 at 10:36 pm #130768NotanymoreParticipant
Thank you for accepting me in this forum.
Luckily, I’m divorced now but I’m still dealing with the psicological pain caused by my ex.
My relationship with my adolescent son and daughter is being complicated.
I can’t talk about what I feel like to anybody. They don’t seem to understand or believe me.
I’m in my (detail removed by moderator) and I don’t think I’ll be able to trust any other man to become a partner.
I find reading your experiences and advice very useful.
1st September 2021 at 12:59 pm #130847HaloParticipant
Hey, feel free to give me a message if you like. Seems like we both are in the same situation
1st September 2021 at 7:42 pm #130867Brunette3Participant
i am completely new to this all. and feel very apprehensive opening up.
so if anyone feels like having a private chat then please feel free to message me.
my partner is a lot older than me and drinks alot. his behaviour when he drinks is 10x worse to when he isnt drunk.
just makes me doubt myself with everything and i find myself defending him endlessly…..
1st September 2021 at 8:11 pm #130868KIP.Participant
Alcohol doesn’t cause abuse. Many people drink and are not abusive. He chooses to abuse you so don’t confuse the two. Talk to your local women’s aid. It’s shocking to discover that the person we love and we think loves us is actually deliberately abusing and destroying us.
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