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I have been with my partner for a long time now I notice he had a temper and lied albeit but didn’t know how bad this situation was we have 3 children in the house and he shouts and screams all the time he been up in there faces and I have have to step in the way but when I say what he doing I get well you do the same and am not aloud to say anything, I try to explain about the same things he dose to Mr and he says am putting him down and am the one doing that,I have tried to leave but he says he taking all the money or he not leaving the house I have bad health so he says I will not be able to cope because I lost all my disability benefits, not only this he has had a bed weed problem where he been spending £60 and more a week we owe alot of money now too he says he stopped but he done this before and started again am not happy and I don’t know how I can help save me a d the kids and prove what going on because he makes out it me or in my head I feel like am going mad
Hi LonelyFamily,
Welcome to the forum, I hope you find it a supportive place to be.
It is part of the abuse to make you feel like you are going mad or that you are the one perpetrating the abuse. He does this hoping you will doubt yourself and never feel able to leave. He makes you feel like you will never cope without him. It is a vicious cycle of abuse where you can’t see a way out.
You and the children deserve better than this and you can cope without him. I would encourage you to access ongoing support from a domestic abuse service. They can meet you and help you to make a safety plan.
You can also call the National Domestic Violence Helpline on 0808 2000 247. The line is available 24/7 and calls are answered by trained female support workers.
Take care and keep posting.
Best Wishes,
Lisa
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