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    • #119054
      Freedom @

      How do you know the difference?
      Has anyone figured it out in these situations? I have a bad feeling that everything hes saying regarding separation is far too amicable especially that he keeps saying ” I’m being completely honest with you, I can be adult about this” I have a feeling its complete tosh. I cant figure out what hes up to behind the scenes or maybe I’m just being paranoid? Anybody else experience this?

    • #119056

      Yes it’s exactly what abuse does. Makes us really unsure but you can bet if he’s an abuser he only has one persons interest in mind and that’s not yours. If you can’t trust your own judgement then trust professionals. Talk to a solicitor. Get the facts. Behind the scenes he’s making sure he’s getting everything. My ex was bad mouthing me to anyone that would listen. Emptying the joint bank account. If he accuses you of something that’s what he’s doing himself. If he says he’s being reasonable then he’s doing the opposite. If he says he’s not involving the children you can bet he is doing exactly that. Do not trust him. Cut him out the equation.

    • #119058

      Never listen to what they say. Always look at what they do. Actions over words. Never words over actions. This is my rule of thumb for everyone.

    • #119079

      Intuition – trust it! My ex said the same thing. He was neither adult nor reasonable. He said he would be reasonable as it was his way of telling me I had to be reasonable. I was, he wasn’t. It was his way of trying to take me to the cleaners. Get a good solicitor, preferably one who specialises in abuse cases.

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