27th January 2021 at 6:34 pm #120501Daisy FairydustParticipant
I just wanted to put it out there that there are positive moments through all of this. My children and I have been in refuge for a (detail removed by moderator) or so now. Whilst you could look at the negatives I choose to look to the positive.
We have love and laughter in our unit of three. I can come and go as I please without my abuser asking constantly where I’d been, who I’d seen and spoken too, or checking up on me with a phone call, accusing me of flirting with everyone.
We can eat as we please without him saying he doesn’t like it, doesn’t want, wants something different etc.
I have money now that I don’t have to beg for – have been able to handle my own wage for the first time in many, many years.
My bed sheets are are soft and fluffy and clean, I’m not on edge sharing a bed with him anymore, I have the bed all to me.
Yes I have lots of things that I have to do, but there is no pressure, women’s aid are just lovely. I get very emotional every time I have to tell my story to someone new, Most likely have PTSD but I again I choose to see the positive, it will get easier to tell my story the more it’s said out loud, PTSD will fade in time.
I’m discovering who I am again and what I like to do. I had an epiphany the other day, I realised my self worth and I am worth way more than that man and any other man like him.
Most of all, I am at peace and have a calm mind.
Sending love and positivity to you all, whether you are still at home, just out or have been out for some time.
27th January 2021 at 7:36 pm #120505KIP.Participant
Well done, you do sound positive.
We are everything without them, they are nothing without us
Good luck 💕
27th January 2021 at 9:02 pm #120511LisaMain Moderator
Hi Daisy Fairydust
I just wanted to show you some support and thank you for your post. It is really positive and gives other survivors who are reading it some hope.
You have been on such a difficult journey, you’re doing really well so stay strong.
You deserve to be happy and free from abuse, this is the start of a much happier future for you and your children.
Take care and please keep posting to let us know how you are getting on,
28th January 2021 at 2:47 am #120522gettingtiredParticipant
Hello, what a lovely post 💟
Your positivity is inspiring. Thank you for sharing x
30th January 2021 at 11:33 pm #120729Tinkerbell2020Participant
Hi I am feeling the same calm and quiet no interigations , accusations and outbursts to deal with. I like no tv on just silence as it’s new to me. No banging things to provoke a reaction , no insults or threats to intimidate.I would fill my days to avoid him , now I’m relaxing.My children were worried as they’ve never seen me like this all their lives I have functioned in alert mode and now I don’t have to , they’re adjusting to me adjusting too . Take care and I wish you all the best x
31st January 2021 at 3:22 pm #120762HettyParticipant
So happy for you and your children. What a lovely post. The possibilities are endless now you are free. I too have enjoyed finding peace and calm and having a bed to myself. I woke up this morning content and calm. Before I hated weekends x*x
31st January 2021 at 5:00 pm #120773Daisy FairydustParticipant
Thank you for all your lovely comments. Tinkerbell, I know exactly what you mean. I’ve got no TV on at the moment and my crackling candle burning away whilst I read a book. I too used to have to listen to banging coming from the kitchen, or singing and whistling, especially if I was trying to have a moment of calm. It’s so lovely to be able to read in peace without a jealous comment if I wasn’t giving him attention.
31st January 2021 at 7:26 pm #120790arteckphoenixParticipant
Your post is inspiring! Thank you for sharing x
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