Playing the Victim

[Haven]

I have tried to leave many times over the years but I always end up returning as he wins me back, one way or another.

I am a Christian and attend church. He has never come and knows how I have always wanted him to come along with me. Last time I left he ended up turning up at my church, signing up to a course etc etc. I forgave him, then back together. I recently returned to our home (which I left) found a (detail removed by Moderator) cancer tshirt and sponsor form and a note about him going to GP for tests. He says he is ill but I’m sure it’s a pity party…will be public with raising money for (detail removed by Moderator) cancer??? & get lots of attention or he wants me to freak out, feel sorry for him and come back. Desperate measures as he knows I mean business this time and we are close to the (detail removed by Moderator) and our house is on the market. I have very little contact with him now, unless I have to,  in relation to financial agreement.

I asked him if he was ok? Said not to worry and the GP will deal with it. He is just doing more charity work.

What is this? Does he know he behaves badly & he is doing charity work to make himself feel better?

Time will tell if he really is unwell & I’m sorry to say, I still will not be returning if he is.

I don’t trust him and living with him makes me feel mentally and physically unwell.

[Yesican]

Good for you Haven. You are almost free.

My ex also played the victim card and with (detail removed by Moderator) cancer too. He had it and I got pulled back in again as I felt so sorry for him. He was and still is convinced he is going to die a painful death. It’s not my responsibility to take care of him, particularly when he got even more abusive when ill.

They tell so many lies that it is hard to know what to believe. Charity work ?

Keep on keeping on and good luck to you

[Author]

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