Pregnant and leaving

[Sunflowerbright]

I feel like I just need some reassurance or advice on what’s best to do.

I am currently pregnant and in a domestic violence relationship. When he’s sober things are fine and he’s nice however things can change once he’s had a drink. I still plan to leave but am going through the ‘guilt’ stage which is apparently normal to go through. I don’t want to take away his role as ‘dad’ and take anything regarding the baby away from him. Would I be the ao if I didn’t let him in the delivery room? Or have contact with his child (supervised)? The nice side of me wants to remember the good side of him and I don’t want to take it away, I may feel different once I’ve left but I need opinions please, thank you.

[Lisa]

Hi Sunflowerbright,

Thank you for your post. I’m sorry to hear about your situation. There is no justfication for domestic abuse- lots of people drink and do not treat their partners in this way. You are not a bad person for needing to set boundaries and protect your child from his behaviour. I know it is hard to unpick those feelings of guilt- but this is not your guilt to carry.

I would encourage you to contact your local domestic abuse service for ongoing support with your situation.

Best Wishes

Lisa

[Author]

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