Pretend to be fine but it isn’t

[Karisqq]

It has been a few months since last time I visited. These few months I have been trying to move on and throw everything behind bc I’ve moved to a new city, but the impact of abuse is tough. Alongside with some abuses by my parents, I also come across abuses outside closed relationships in the previous city unfortunately, and I must admit I still feel anxious, powerless and ashamed, thinking that I should have been stronger, I should have said no to the abuser. Everyday I’m trying to out on a brave face and pretend that it doesn’t matter, but it does, when I’m alone in my room I feel so angry and sad, I don’t feel like I deserve good things, I’m scared that ppl are going to attack me or abandon me someday… Prob I need a good cry and a good chance to grief, idk.

[Lisa]

Hi Karisqq,

Thank you for your post. I’m sorry to hear about your situation. Moving to a new place is a big step and you may need time to feel safe again- be kind to yourself you have been enduring a lot. You have a right to feel angry and to feel sad sometimes- you do deserve good things.

You can access free online courses created by or in partnership with therapists specialising in trauma at Bloom. These courses can be accessed in your own time and at your own pace and cover topics such as trauma, abuse and boundaries.

Best Wishes

Lisa

[Author]

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