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    • #104637
      survivorabuse
      Participant

      The court has given him unsupervised contact. My (removed by moderator) takes the kids to him because we would just end up having arguments. My problem is when he’s had them, my eldest especially is very rude to me after. He hasn’t seen them since lockdown but (removed by moderator) has been arranged for him to have them.

      Can I get my eldest to be more respectful of me after? He is lovely normally it’s just after he’s been with his dad

      It just feels like he is told to be horrible to me.

    • #104638
      KIP.
      Participant

      When you’re both calm try to have a conversation about his behaviour and how it’s upsetting and disrespectful. Ask what you’re doing to deserve it? That you won’t tolerate abuse again. Perhaps you could plan to do something you all like on their return x Pizza and movie. Movie and popcorn. It’s good you notice the behaviour comes after contact. It could be he blaming you for the breakup or For him having to deal with his dad now, sometimes it’s easier to take anger and frustration out on who they perceive as the weaker parent because no doubt his dad would lose the plot. The NSPCC have a good helpline if you wanted to chat it through or there’s the national domestic abuse helpline too.

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