11th October 2021 at 10:35 am #132354EmptybutfreeParticipant
Sending everyone lots of love.
I wanted to ask if anyone had managed to get a ptsd diagnosis after abuse?
I am currently going through the process now, I have a block of therapy but now beginning trauma based therapy.
I have been referred to a psychiatrist but there’s a chance they won’t accept my referral. Has anyone been in the same position?
To give an insight… I am free from my abuser, he is in prison and away from me which is good news. The not so good news is that his issues have now become my issues and I’m suffering terribly with flashbacks, bad dreams, I avoid going certain places as I can no tolerate the triggers.
I’ve been given medication off the GP but I don’t know what else I can do.
Even though I’m out of that situation, I didn’t realise the effect it’d have on me long term. I need and want a healthy mind. It’s sad and scary, how much damage they do to us.
Thank you for reading my babble, please let me know if anyone has experienced anything similar xx
11th October 2021 at 7:59 pm #132384DarcyParticipant
Hi beautiful angel… Emptybutfree,
Firstly thank you for sending out your love to everyone
I am not sure how far down the line you are with being away from your abuser but please remember this is a journey and it takes time for us to piece ourselves back together, so be kind and gentle with yourself
When I left my ex I was very fragile and scared of what he would do… this was a genuine realistic fear as I knew what he was capable of… on the other hand though I was not going to live any more of my life being his victim so I had to c***k on.
Each day was a small step… I had a dog at the time and he needed to be walked but I didn’t want to go out on my own, but slowly each day I would walk him a little further than the day before… I did these small steps in every area of my life until I got braver and braver
I was cautious about telling people my full name, where I lived, who I knew … lots of things that before I would take for I wouldn’t have had a problem doing
Eventually I had to get perspective on what was the worse that could happen, for example if my ex found out where I worked … the worst he could do is show up and make a scene, admittedly this wouldn’t have been great but if he did Id be around other people and he couldn’t hurt me or control me like he use to
As long as I kept myself in ‘sensible’ and didn’t walk down dark alleys alone etc in reality I was more than likely going to be OK
I guess what I am trying to say is that you have to have a realistic perspective of what your fear is … your partner is in prison so he cant get you… yes he’s left his mark but don’t allow that to identify you and you still be under his control
What’s helped me is yoga, especially doing lots of grounding work, meditating, affirmations and visualisations … but this isn’t just a once a week thing this is a daily practice … like anything you have to work at it, over and over
You are free now my darling, do not let this man take up anymore of your time
You have two options now, to start the work on yourself or to remain his victim
I believe you have got this and are strong enough to move forward
Sending you continued love and support
12th October 2021 at 9:11 am #132398maddogParticipant
It’s very common to get a diagnosis of PTSD after an abusive relationship. Our reactions are normal.
It’s really good that you’re getting trauma therapy. Hopefully, it’ll help you find a safe place to process what’s happened to you. The meds will help to reduce the anxiety & the force of the panic.
Please remember that you’re not going mad, and because now you are safe, you’re now in a position to access the horrors.
It may sound silly to say to focus on breathing. Some people recommend yoga as a healing practice and meditation can be helpful. I’m sure your therapist will guide you.
I wonder how often trauma is at the root of mental illness. Obviously not all the time.
You may find Rape Crisis helpful as well.
Well done for reaching out and getting onto your journey of recovery.
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