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    • #111023
      Weepingwillow
      Participant

      I feel a complete failure in life. I have become all he said, fat, lazy , poor excuse for a mother, stupid. I lost my mom to cancer then my dad to suicide and he’s got worse, uses that against me . My oldest son hardly speaks to us anymore. I sense my Sister has had enough of me being his doormat. The only thing that’s keeoing me going are my sons but I know I’m failing them too . I can’t see a way forward. I forget things get confused am clumsy. I try to read up on things then feel overwhelmed and go back into burying my head in the sand . On and on , never ending and I just don’t know what to do

    • #111028
      Eggshells
      Participant

      Oh my love, you sound like you’re in a bad place at the moment. I am so sorry to hear about your parents. I can only imagine how you must be feeling.

      You are not alone. I know we’re not there in the flesh but we are here whenever you need us.

      Have you been to your GP to get any help with depression? Feeling demotivated, forgetful and clumsiness are all classic symptoms.

      I also felt like my sister was getting fed up with it all. I’ll be honest, it was one of the motivating factors behind me leaving. I just realised how often I was moaning to her and that I had to change something. Infact she wasn’t getting fed up, she just felt helpless and didn’t know what to say.

      Why do you feel like you are failing your sons?

    • #111033
      Weepingwillow
      Participant

      Thanks Eggshells . I am already on antidepressants, have been for about (detail removed by Moderator) years. I have had therapy after finding dad and have a few sessions left.
      I just hate myself for getting Me and the kids in this situation and being to weak to get out of it . I feel like my sons suffer from hearing but I know they love him -and I know my oldest would be devastated if we split. Him and my husband were rowing some time back and he said to our son that our arguments are mainly caused by him and If we split it would be his fault . My son messaged us both after saying he loved us both and is sorry .

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