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    • #145799
      longjourneylife
      Participant

      I feel like I’m going to vomit. He set me up ( to marry, to work, to pump out babies when he knew I was wanting to break free …) And he set me up to leave and be unable to return. It’s a horrific feeling. I still feel d****d by him, while he remains in full control. What I don’t understand is he can get a solicitor, instead I have to, why ? The thought of court is terrifying. How can I protect my babies? Police can’t do anything unless something happens…I feel like a sitting duck, I’m so scared. Really really scared.

    • #145802
      Hereforhelp
      Participant

      Long journey, I want to hug you as I have felt what you are feeling and it’s so painful. I have been looking back and i can see that he trapped me in so many ways right from the start. I used to have a great job, social life and lots of confidence. Hang in there Longjourney, you are so brave, you got out and no matter what’s ahead it will be better than what you have endured. Can you see a female GP?
      I am quite some (detail removed by Moderator) on, zero contact (our teenagers decided for themselves and there’s nothing he can do about that, good!). I am still financially controlled by him for now. I see him, as in, I really see who he is and what he has always been, he is disgusting and I am so glad to be out. I am just starting to get to know me again, I made myself small around him for (detail removed by Moderator) and my personality altered. I did the freedom programme, have you done it? It really helped me to accept that I had been abused in nearly every way by my husband. He is a high earner, I go to food banks and I still know we are better off without him. You are not alone, that’s why I shared some of my story with you as yours resonated with me ❤ keep posting,
      What sort of support do you have?

    • #145809
      longjourneylife
      Participant

      That’s so sweet, thank you for sharing and the hug!
      I had no choices and I keep thinking we’ll go to court and he’ll annihilate me. His word is so strong and I’ve been so weak, he’s so crafty, I can’t trust anyone we knew. I’m really scared how a judge will order and how the kids will be ( still young) I know I’m overthinking.Thankfully I’ve been able to go back to family, they’ve been worried for years. I’m so so scared though and I don’t want to be a downer, it’s just so draining. Freedom Programme is very informative, in a way though, it frightens me more because he still has so much control and I don’t know what’s next. I keep checking over my shoulder. Will hold onto that hug though, thank you!

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