Viewing 14 reply threads
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    • #26490
      Whathaveidone
      Participant

      It’s been a while but a lot of positive things have happened since reporting my situation to the police.

      I can’t quite believe it but I’m going back to college to continue my education. I’m a bit anxious but equally excited at the same time. It feels like I’ve really got my life back.

      I thank all the ladies on this forum because if it wasn’t for all you’re feedback and support, I don’t think I ever would have got out of my toxic and distorted relationship.

      x*x

    • #26496
      Anonymous
      Inactive

      Well done!! Hope you enjoy every moment of it and I am really proud of you for taking your life into your own hands

      • #32741
        Whathaveidone
        Participant

        Thank you so much. Although challenging, I’m enjoying college so much – it helps me see that I’m progressing and moving forward with my life.

    • #26499
      Ayanna
      Participant

      Another powerful woman who defeats male violence! 🙂

      • #32742
        Whathaveidone
        Participant

        Thank you Ayanna. The majority of women have to put up with a lot of s*** but this is in no way going to deter me from reaching my goals and achieving my dreams like I let him do before.

    • #26617
      Serenity
      Participant

      Well done.

      My returning to studying irked him but I am so glad I saw it through. It helped to give me financial security and helped me realise that I didn’t need him and his abuse in order to survive.

      • #32743
        Whathaveidone
        Participant

        Thank you Serenity and well done to you. I also hope to achieve the same – invest in myself in terms of furthering my education in order to get a secure job so that I can support myself.

    • #26627
      lover of no contact
      Participant

      Well done. Thanks for your inspiring post. The best of luck with your new beginnings in a positive direction, living life and living a life free of abuse.

      • #32744
        Whathaveidone
        Participant

        Thank you lover of no contact. I am embracing the new challenges that college brings but I love it because it’s far from the life I lived before where I was suffocated and under constant surveillance by him, not being able to continue to earn or learn and being totally reliant on him. No more. I love the freedom and have totally taken my life back into my hands which I am absolutely loving – free from abuse.

    • #26634
      Shelly123
      Participant

      Well done best of luck at college x

      • #32746
        Whathaveidone
        Participant

        Thank you so much Shelly. Although the workload is alot, I am relishing this opportunity and would rather this than living with abuse every day of the week. I am grateful for everyday I have now that is free from abuse.

    • #26635
      Falling Skys
      Participant

      Good luck xx so proud of you xx

      • #32747
        Whathaveidone
        Participant

        Thank you so much Falling Skys. College, although sometimes challenging, is great! I’m so grateful.

    • #26636
      KIP.
      Participant

      Fantastic. Knowledge is power. My local college run a course in councelling. I’m tempted to do that. There is an introduction to councelling part time I might start with. I should be an expert already!

      • #32748
        Whathaveidone
        Participant

        Yes KIP knowledge certainly is power and I am really enjoying college at the moment. Did you enroll onto the part-time introduction to councelling course?

    • #26672
      Suntree
      Participant

      Good luck with your new adventure 🙂

    • #32753

      Well done and good luck. That sounds so positive and it’s all down to you! It’s really put a smile on my face its your future and you have decided how to shape it. Well done xxxx

      • #32759
        Whathaveidone
        Participant

        Thank you so much Positiveandlookingahead. I’m so grateful for this opportunity because it really feels like I’m moving forward with my life. I’ve literally taken my life back into my own hands.

    • #32772

      This is fantastic. Us women are strong, bright intelligent people, who have just been unlucky to get embroiled with abusive men. This is great news. XXXXX

      (i’m considering some sort of degree course too)

    • #32957
      Anonymous
      Inactive

      Well done! I am really enjoying being back in uni and doing something where I am not defined by what has happened to me. I even got the confidence to become a course rep which I got into trouble for doing when I was with ex.😄

    • #33080
      Serenity
      Participant

      When I was with him, my brain turned to mush firstly because of being a mum ( nappy talk) but, far more serious, the prolonged trauma had stopped my brain working properly., his abuse had really dumbed me down.

      I don’t know how or why I suddenly gathered the strength to do a course. I didn’t ask him, I just did it.

      When I first started the course, I felt overwhelmed. I felt stupid compared to the others. I remember thinking that I was stupid compared to when I was younger. It’s like my brain had been destroyed. I didn’t realise at the time that it was becaus of abuse: I thought it was my illness.

      But I stuck at it. It’s like I had to ‘relearn’ how to think. My essays probably took me three times longer to write than some, because my mind was so slow. But I passed. And I went on to a second course, and a third.

      I think my ex was flabbergasted when I got offered a job when I hadn’t even finished my course.

      What I am saying is to all ladies who think they are too fragile or damaged to ever return to study, you’ve just got to do it, and by doing it, the cogs start turning again, and with supportive tutors and friendly comrades, you grow in strength. You encourage your brain to return to its normal state.

      Whatever damage has been done, work can be done to reduce it. The brain has plasticity.

    • #33087
      lilaclady
      Participant

      Well done!! Love this post and it’s giving me hope! I am so glad you are moving forward and going to college. Enjoy every moment xx

    • #33348
      Suntree
      Participant

      Fantastic and I hope you really enjoy college

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