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Left my husband who’s worn me into the ground left several times before but felt guilty and gone back. I’ve endured daily insults and constant yelling. Strangled me into silence destroyed my only possessions alienated me from the world!! Lived together,worked together I was his carer (detail removed by moderator) I’ve spoken to domestic abuse and they are wonderful it’s just the nights I’m in pain missing him however I do realise if I don’t do it this time my mental health will decline fast. I’ve had no proper connection with the Internet for (detail removed by moderator) until a lady a center told me to look here. I’ve no friends anymore and nobody understands
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Hi Lostnalone, I understand! And the women who use this forum understand too.
My ex used his ‘PTSD’ (self diagnosed) as an excuse for literally everything he did wrong. It is not an excuse!!! And he certainly is not a hero, he’s a coward and a fraud.Of course it is normal for you to feel guilty, I can bet you are a kind and caring woman like a lot of us here, who would do anything for anyone. We feel empathy and so it is only natural to feel guilty. Unfortunately what I have learnt since leaving my ex, is that they don’t feel the same! They don’t feel guilty for hurting us and ruining us.
Well done for leaving. Trust me I know how hard it is to leave and not go back. You are not alone any more, you have us. We understand! Xx
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It does ease. One of the things I’ve learnt from this forum and from reading about abuse, is to let yourself feel what you are feeling and try not to be too hard on yourself. These men put us through a lot. I also learnt that breaking away from an abusive relationship has similar physical and emotional symptoms to coming off drugs. You will feel so many emotions and this is completely normal. Ride these feelings out and they will ease in time. Keep posting on here and read what you can about abuse to make some sense of it, I found that helped xx
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Hello and welcome. Well done for getting out! This forum is a godsend, you’ll recognise so many common things and realise you’re not alone anymore. The grief comes in waves, it does ease but like any addiction you’ll have days you miss him like mad but I promise those fade, you’re in a much better place without him x
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Thanku Bananaboat I’ve usually give in and gone back by now. U are right this forum is so reassuring. I don’t do social media so I have hardly had any contact with the world. I’m so much pain it’s horrible!! Still not as painful as running things he’s said and done through my mind. But just gona keep reading. Thanku from the bottom of my heart ❤️
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