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    • #114088
      Imagesha
      Participant

      Hi.
      In the process of realizing my situation and reading online about it, I found out that an emotionally abusive partner can slowly become physically violent. I was wondering how often this transition happens.
      Especially in cases where it looked like “he would never go that far”. I won’t go into details, but lately he has started doing some rather disturbing gestures.. of course, if I ask him, he is just joking…
      That is happening since I started to try and put boundaries.

    • #114092
      Hazydayz
      Participant

      Hi again Imagesha. This is a question you might be asking yourself and it is a Red Flag sign that you need to take notice of!A warning sign! lots of us worry about. It can be that you are seeing this when they feel they are losing control over you. Your abuser will definately make bigger attempts to dominate you. The book living with the dominator that KIP I see mentioned to you on your other post should provide the answer to your questions. Check it out if you can? đź’ž

    • #114093
      Imagesha
      Participant

      Thanks Hazydayz! I will see about the book, maybe a kindle version.. he is currently monitoring the mail box among other things. He would not like the book.

      • #114094
        Hazydayz
        Participant

        You have got problems there haven’t you! Stay safe! Kindle! Don’t let him see what your reading! Stay safeđź’ž

    • #114200
      Camel
      Participant

      Hi Imagesha

      I expect the answer is complicated. If your abuser feels he is losing control he will use whatever means necessary to put you back in your place.

      Some abusers start early on with physical violence. Later on, just the threat of assault will be enough. The victim will do anything to prevent an attack and will live with the constant stress of ‘what’s coming.’

      Other abusers start with coercive control and escalate from there. Arguments might get more scary – shouting, foaming at the mouth, breaking things, throwing things, blocking your exit, slamming doors, driving dangerously. Next is pushing and shoving. Often we minimise this kind of behaviour as we don’t have bruises. However, this is already physical abuse. They are using their physicality to control, punish, threaten.

      Probably we’re all told to see physical violence as the ‘worst’ kind of abuse. And maybe that anything else isn’t as bad. But it’s all bad.

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