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    • #96090
      Fudgecake
      Participant

      I haven’t been on here much lately to comment but I have been reading the posts. I hope everyone is warm and as good as can be in this dark January. I’ve been going through a low patch and having unsettling dreams. The other day I had three dreams in one day. The first was when I had a nap in the afternoon. It was a lovely dream of me and my ex where he was the person I thought he’d be and we were in the first throws of our relationship where it was all wonderful ( I now know this was love bombing, but it was nice at the time). The second was at night and woke me up. It was our relationship at the end and all the unpleasantness where he’d turned into an abusive control freak. My final dream was of my marriage which ended a long time ago. We were young and starting out, full of plans and hope for the future. I hadn’t dreamt of my ex husband for a very long time.

      Needless to say I felt very unsettled. I’m guessing it’s ptsd and that my abuser is still able to mess with my head even now. If he knew he’d be delighted, I’m sure.

      Take care ladies, spring isn’t far away. x

    • #96135
      fizzylem
      Participant

      Sounds like the process of letting go FC, let it in, let it go? Did you spend time reflecting on what happened? Only no reflection time is ever a waste of time is it and giving yourself space to feel how you do.

      I’ve not had any dreams like this for a long time now, but can remember when I did, messed with my head a bit, made me think why am I dreaming about him and why now, after all this time and after everthing that’s happened, guess we need to, but I can see now, now I’m further along, that it was about being honest with myself, pretty sure it wasnt long after that I let go of thinking it was love, could see i thought it was at the time because i needed that, maybe these dreams came about because I just wanted to feel it again, go back, a few more times, before I finally let it go and sent it into the past. Maybe they helped to accept reality, now when i think of him i feel disgust, nothing, sadness, pity, anger occasionally, and I can’t actually believe I ever thought we were compatible, I would never have chosen him to be my friend, so why I did for my lover – where was my head at, oh yes, swept up in feeling wanted. Its uncomfortable to have these type of dreams but I reckon they are part of the process of letting go xx

    • #96365
      Fudgecake
      Participant

      Thank you for your reply Fizzylem. I like your idea of letting it in to let it go. I think that’s what is happening. Pretty awful though to have to go through all of it again in dreams.

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