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    • #19605
      betterdays
      Participant

      Horrible with it being fathers day don’t know why. Haven’t sent him a card he don’t deserve one. But still feel awful. Feeling emptiness again like I did weeks ago. Still hurting still trying to work it out and wondering why were not together. It’s like he’s died hope I’m not going backwards x

    • #19606

      Sorry to hear that Betterdays. I know how you feel, i feel sadness in my heart too. Today I have thought about my ex and feel that I still love him, i have thought about the good times that we had.

      • #19608
        betterdays
        Participant

        Hi healthy archive yes I’m thinking the same. It makes it difficult as he only lives (detail removed by Moderator) mins away. His family (detail removed by Moderator) minutes away too. I went to pick my sister up today and I passed his van as he were outside his mums flat it’s only way I can go. It’s all triggers. I sometimes think it’s a dream. I wonder if I’ve done right thing and if I should of give him another chance x

    • #19619

      Dear Betterdays, I feel exactly the same way that you do – at the moment.

      Feelings and emotions are funny, 2 or 3 days ago I felt happy, free and confident that I had got him out of my system and could now start my life again. This morning as soon as I woke as usual I thought about him. I cannot really understand it but last night i was reading this good article on trauma bonding, sometimes its hard to read and take in this sort of information, something to do with stress and shutting down. But I have managed to read the first part of the article, it says that trauma bonding occurs when there was an imbalance of power that is very much what I had. I will find the article and post it to you. Today I feel that I still really love my ex and feel sad for him. XXXXX

    • #19621

      Here is the link that I was reading last night. The first two sections on intermittent reinforcement and imbalance of power were definately there with my ex. Also I denied everything for about 2 years. https://victimsofpsychopaths.wordpress.com/traumatic-bonding/

      • #19630
        betterdays
        Participant

        Thankyou healthy archive I will read up on this. X*x

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