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So today I get a text from my eldest daughter; why don’t you want to speak to me anymore? I explained in a short text because the last time you called me the abusive one you know that is not true and I’m not going to tolerate that from you. She went on to say that she was thinking of taking me to court for sibling rights? Is that a possibility? Anyway the messages flew from there. I’ve asked her to read why does he do that and about n********m plus the flying monkey theory. She seems to be in complete denial. She didn’t identify with any of it so what do I do? She said she’s reading about parents who are too immature to rear children? I hope she comes back to me once she’s read a bit more. Is she in the FOG like I once was? I get that. She is oblivious to the fact that witnessing domestic abuse as a child is child abuse.let’s hope she sees sense. Today I’ve been completely honest with her. I really want her to face this. It was strange that she commented that her Father had said to her all you want to do is play happy families with your mum’s side after all they have done to me! Talk about gaslighting and playing the victim! To do this to your child is just out and out wrong. Any advice appreciated maybe I’ve approached this the wrong way 😐😧xx
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Hi DIY, it takes us all so long to admit what is happening in our lives is happening. It’s taken me decades to accept what my OH does is abusive, that i dont have to put up with it. A child’s point of view is so different to a partners. She’s torn between the two of you, she’s been gaslighted and manipulated her whole life. She’s trauma bonded as much as we are. I have a difficult relationship with my daughter it breaks my heart. My OH had messed up that mother/ daughter bond i always dreamed of having since i didn’t with my own mother. Sometimes we have moments, other times, she is him😢😢
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Good morning IWMB, I hope your day has started of well ☺💕and your right she did say that she felt torn. She asked if what I wanted to achieve was cutting ties with him. All round I think it would be best but she obviously doesn’t want to do that. I wonder if this situation turns us very black and white or maybe that’s just who I am? I’m no able to be objective anymore, maybe fear does that to us, our protective screen comes up at the first red flag. I think that’s only natural. I’m sorry to hear you have had the same experience. You know we have a little knowledge now and we can piece things together better now. I hope one day our children can do this as well ☺when it comes to our kids we never give up do we?as mothers it’s not an option. Hard going though xx thanks for the reply, it’s a lovely day here I hope you have a good one 😊💕xxxx
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