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So after a lot of reaching out, and a lot of communication, a lot of support, I’ve finally decided to go to a refuge with kids. However, I didn’t get confirmation on refuge on the day I was supposed to hear…absolutely nothing.
When I called my case worker, I got told that the way I answered the questions from the refuge about my work situation is now causing a problem. Apparently because I answered that I worked (even though I do very little and get paid very very little – and I was transparent about how much I will be earning and how much I have in my bank account, again very very little), the refuge has sent an extortionate invoice to the council and the council is most probably not able to sign it off.
The case worker told me to try and speak to the refuge and clarify it but 1) I don’t have their number 2) I don’t really know how else I can be more transparent. Am I supposed to beg and justify my case? Is that how it works?
I can’t really comprehend what is happening. I’m financially abused and barely have any money, and the support is turning me down because I/council can’t afford it? What on earth is going on???
I kept telling myself this is one of the hardest bit, keep going – I was so scared but still went ahead and did everything I could. I felt I had all the support, then only to be met with yet again “finance issue” as always in my life. I can’t even take my kids to fastfood and it turns out I can’t even go to refuge. I’ve been trying so hard for so long to get any job while looking after my small kids, and I eventually found something that pays me very low, but flexible enough for me to handle, and I’m being punished for the effort?
This really broke me, it really did. I just feel despair. Has anyone here experienced anything like this? What was the outcome? Any comments would be appreciated at the moment.
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Hi hellokitty,
I’m really glad that posting made you feel better, sometimes just getting things out really helps.
Refuge is usually funded through the housing part of benefits, so if you’re not eligible to claim that, for example if you’re working, then it can be expensive to fund. It sounds like maybe that’s what’s happened here. Knowing that doesn’t change the situation but could help with making sense out of why this is happening. You deserve to access safe accommodation so that you can get free of the abuse. You also deserve clear communication from services.
I wasn’t sure if your case worker is a housing worker with the council or a worker from your local domestic abuse service. If you’re not already in touch with your local domestic abuse service, you might want to reach out to them for some support and advocacy around accessing safe accommodation. You can find their details using our service directory (where you also may be able to find the contact number for the refuge). If the council aren’t willing to fund the refuge place then they should be offering you an alternative option.
You could contact our Live Chat service to discuss this situation further. Shelter also have a live chat and a helpline where they can offer expert advice about your housing rights.
Take care and keep posting,
Lisa-
Thank you very much Lisa for the information, I really appreciate it!
I’ve managed to get hold of the refuge, they said they will update me after they have a meeting and assured me that the bill they sent across isn’t anything big. I will keep trying even if this time it doens’t somehow work out & keep posting, thank you, this forum really has saved me so many times!
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