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Since I move out (I don’t feel strong bcouse of this as I move out bcouse he assaulted me and choose his new gf to be in his life) I feel like I’m force to be out from his life.
Since then I try live my life alone. Socialise with friends, travelling, working, and spend time helping and do good things for others. But that doesn’t help me feel good about my self. I still feel I am bad women failed I life.
I still feel I wish I can make him love me, so he didn’t beat me, I wish I’m not me. I wish he comfort me now. Say sorry what he did and loving me more than ever. But instead he blame me for making him abused me, he don’t feel guilty for having new gf as our relationship have no future! But here I am still thinking of him everyday, wishing he understand my feeling, wondering if he missing me. Why would he if he have new girl friend he busy with. I am pathetic, stupid women!! May be that’s why I have been abused!! -
Hello and I’m sorry you are feeling this way. He is an abuser, you did absolutely nothing wrong. Abusers never change and the next woman in his life will also be abused. It’s just a matter of time. I’ve been where you are now, on my road to recovery. I can promise you things will get better but it will take time. He will never say sorry because he thinks he hasn’t done anything wrong. He will make you carry all the guilt so that he doesn’t have to. You’ve been through an awful trauma and it will take time to heal. Remember the life you had before him. You will get a better life where you can learn from your abuse and never let it happen again. Don’t ever expect any closure from these men. You will never get it. Concentrate on yourself. You have a blank page now and you can colour that page in with bright and beautiful things. Stay strong. It will get better x
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