What’s the right steps to leave an abusive partner

[Freshbluerose]

Hi,
I finally took the decision to leave my n********t psycho end emotional abuser partner but I am not sure what steps I have to do. I have a young child as well. The home we are living is from council and is under my name. Obviously I don’t want to lose this home. It gives me stability and is a rent that I can afford to pay.
So I was thinking to ask him to leave the home and then to go to the social services and the police to report his abusive behaviour.
Then I thought it might be better to just take my child and go to our friends and give him some days to take his personal belongings and then I could go back to my home. But will he accuse me for kidnapping?
Then I was wondering if it’s better to go to the lawyer start the process for the custody of my child and then to tell him to go out. I don’t have the money to pay the lawyer but friends and family they are willing to help if this is the safest way.
I am so confused and I don’t know what is the best way. He will fight for the child definitely. He will not accept easily that I want to have his full custody.

[Littlepixie]

If I was you I would try & speak to a solicitor. I had an appointment with one last week & he was brilliant and gave me good advice. I’ve not left yet but have a house to rent once I pluck up the courage to tell him & leave. The solicitor said if I’d have contacted him weeks ago he could have applied for an order to get him out of the house (police had been at our house.) I wish I’d have picked the phone up to him weeks ago but I was so scared to go onto that stage.
If you’re in UC you should get legal aid. I work full time but I’m on a low wage & have just applied for UC for the first time so my solicitor said it’ll be free. Good Lucy & keep yourself & the wee one safe xx

[Freshbluerose]

Unfortunatelly I didn’t have time to do anything except to call the police to help me to go out of home with my child.
I am in a safe place at the moment and I contacted a lawyer for help. Obviously I want to go back to my home when I manage legally to take him out.
Do you have any advice? Any other step that I should do?
I called the social services as well.

[Bananaboat]

Phone your local housing team if you haven’t already x

[Freshbluerose]

I haven’t call the local housing team yet. I called social services and they told me that I have to find a lawyer. From the CAB they told me that I have to apply for an occupational order before I can go back home. It’s sound strange for me that I cant go back to a home that belongs to me.
I am looking for a lawyer now, maybe is another way to go back home and same time to do the occupational order.
Does anybody had similar experience?

[Bananaboat]

Definitely give the council a call. I had a rental property in joint names and they treated me as homeless due to abuse. My local council were lovely and offered lots of support but I get they’re not all the same. As you’re already a council tenant they might help get him out or help you move elsewhere. Worth a call before you spend money on a solicitor anyway x

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