This topic contains 3 replies, has 3 voices, and was last updated by  starqueen 3 weeks, 5 days ago.

  • Author
    Posts
  • #112213
     thankgoodness 
    Participant

    My long-time abuser is unfortunately in hospital, I pray for him but I felt for the first time in years that this family member has no power to abuse me. I have tried to be nice to this family member for years, I even wished him good luck in hospital, but I have always been abused by him. I hope this family member reconciles with me after his big health scare. He needs to stop this immature abuse and grow up! This family member is pure evil, I hope he changes to a nicer person after hospital.

  • #112214
     thankgoodness 
    Participant

    But my predictions are that he won’t change after hospital, he is that evil. I hope this big health scare is a wake up call for him to stop being abusive. I have to play the supportive sister because “family is family” even though this brother is abusive.

  • #112418
     Lisa 
    Main Moderator

    Hi thankgoodness

    I just wanted to show you some support. It sounds like you have been very kind and supportive to this person. Unfortunately I think you are right that it is very unlikely he will change after hospital.

    I hope you have some support in place for yourself as it sounds like a difficult time for you.

    Take care

    Lisa

  • #112972
     starqueen 
    Participant

    I’m keeping my fingers crossed for you thankgoodness, I really do hope that he changes his ways. I have some experience with this, my abuser had worsening health issues. I have to admit that in my case it didn’t get better, the abuse escalated with any kind of stress. Although I hope that this isn’t the case for you, I think it would be useful for you to consider what you might do if it doesn’t change, and how you can support yourself if that does happen. Also, you’re not in any way obligated to someone if they’re abusive towards you – the notion of family works both ways, and if he’s failing to be a decent family member to you, and to give you the support and love that we all deserve from family, you don’t have to put your wellbeing at stake. You can support and love yourself first. Wishing you the best of luck and hoping for a positive outcome for you.

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