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    • #79396

      I think and feel this is a really, really important step with the wardrobe.

      Do you know, I have a door on my child’s wardrobe that I can’t fix.

      It is a considerable achievement of yours. and to be celebrated I believe.

      all best
      ftc
      x

    • #79397

      I think and feel this is a really, really important step with the wardrobe.

      Do you know, I have a door on my child’s wardrobe that I can’t fix.

      It is a considerable achievement of yours. and to be celebrated I believe.

      all best
      ftc
      x

    • #79392

      hello again lilypink,

      I don’t mean to sound simplistic or offensive at all,
      but refuge workers said this to me at some point.
      It is time to put your boxing gloves on. Morally.

      There is something possible that is better than this and with building your self-esteem
      we can help you fight for it.

      all best
      ftc
      x

    • #79369

      Personally, I think the whole notion of ‘co-dependency’ should be questioned and analysed.

      It is a million dollar industry, writing and researching and analysing so-called ‘co-dependency’ personally I think labelling things this way actually prevents people, including so-called professionals looking deeper at issues such as Stockholm Syndrome, Trauma bonding and so on.

      But then my core is person-centred, so Carl Rogers would look at our experiences as they are, and not the label. Which makes complete sense to me with women who are experiencing abuse, as it can crop up in so many different forms…

      ftc
      x

    • #79348

      It is really a strategic thing.

      What I was trying to say, is that if you dont have a PSO then you can move. You can move your kids and make the transition.

      The trick comes in doing it before your ex manages to get the PSO in.

      Wonder if you get my jist?

      all best
      ftc
      x

    • #79347

      Sorry to disagree, but refuges nowadays acknowledge psychological and mental abuse, of course.
      So it does not matter if you are not at risk of physical violence.
      WA recognise there are many forms of abuse
      all best
      ftc
      x

    • #79346

      Please remember that you always have choices around how much you want to share.
      This is known as client autonomy.
      There is no requirement to share more than you feel ready to share, or you wish to.
      all best
      ftc
      x

    • #79301

      hello daisy do, it’s very hard,
      typos here too as my fingers not 100 per cent…

      diymum is spot on I feel,
      perhaps the way of making it most clear for you in your head is that – imagine what you would say to your own daughter if she were, heaven forbid, in the same situation you are now…

      no doubt you would be making it clear that it is possible, you don’t have to wait and that you would support her in her deciisons…so that is what we are here for…isn’t it? maybe to strengthen your self-talk?
      perhaps you could imagine different scenarios for yourself, no doubt fizz might help on law of attraction?

      When we are tired, lonely and living with an abusive person it is difficult to imagine there are any, don’t suppose you get much time to yourself with four kids….

      but there are, really.

      the middle way between staying and going might be renting a place for a while, to get some space in yrou head…as soon as you separate…you can look at the legal issues.

      can’t remember if you are married, but divorce wise we can talk you through it eemotionally,

      in a different household nad separated, yes, it is a transition on benefits etc but it is doable…and won’t you feel great being able to lock the door behind you and snuggle up in your own bed.

      all the best
      ftc
      x

    • #79199

      the reason is, I believe, they are trying to groom your child.
      So sorry to say this so bluntly, but I believe from what you said, it is true
      lean on other ladies on here for support
      keep posting
      ftc
      x

    • #79197

      oh brill love I am so happy for you,
      sending virtual hug and bunch of flowers
      there is hope for the rest of us,
      especially me
      ftc
      x

    • #79196

      And why, oh why lilypink are they seeing your chld without your there?
      is there acourt order in place?
      If not, please take back control,
      don’t allow it
      keep your child close, close, close.
      all best
      ftc
      x

    • #79193

      lilypink.
      Please understand I am posting briefly because I am trying to understand and advise you on what must come first.

      Please understand I know your experience is not my experience, but your experience sounds remarkably similar to mine.

      I left for refuge some years ago.

      Reason being amongst other things I was emotionally abused by ex, but also abused by his birth family, who operated very much like you are descrxibing as a pack of prianhas trying to take parental responsibility off me, or at least smash my self-esteem.

      It is half ten at night, but I would not want any other woman to suffer as I did.

      So I’m asking you to lean on us the other women on here, and the moderator.

      We can help you.

      I want to ask you why they are seeking to take away your power and care as a mum.

      I think personally there is only one reason why they would do this. And the reason is very dark indeed.

      Please take back control

      You are your child’s mum.

      You have parental responsibility.
      (detail removed by moderator)

      But there is not reason, legal, personal or otherwise why they should be trying to make you feel this way.

      Please, please try to get your child out of it.

      From one who knows.

      ftc
      x

    • #79183

      thank you fizz for this post, I could have written it myself.
      babes steps
      ftc
      x

    • #79180

      (removed by moderator)
      main thing you and your child are safe
      x

    • #79178

      I can’t agree more. You leave and believe me, miracles will come your way.
      Especially in refuge.
      Some of the best people went there. other options include dentist appointments, cervical smear tests and rouitine medication reviews…
      ftc
      x
      x

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