Freeforever

[Freeforever]

Hey, I wanted to reply firstly to say about the rape incident that’s absolutely outrageous! What or how can he even justify this? Take if from someone who has lower a very long relationship with my daughter who also sees what her dad is.. as a parent you catty part shame. I owned a house with my ex and literally having to start again to knife and forks to pans and cups so on.. we’ve literally gone into hiding because any contact fears me that he will use that as a opportunity to fill me with his love bombing. It’s awful going through this as you do grieve for someone who’s still breathing but when you sit and have peace and silent without thinking of his selfish needs its worth every inch of what I’m going through.. I have up and down days I try to not look at any photos as that also doesn’t help. Good luck all the future plans you dream will take place in your life with someone who values you. X

[Freeforever]

I have just left my partner for this reason drugs have ruined my family! I have tried to help him support him but nothing works drugs always wins! It’s a selfish addiction.. I went to work every day while he slept off his session ! I hate it it’s scummy dark life to live. I left for my daughter who was also seeing the effects it has. He will lie to you trust me there very good at it! Make you feel like your the one out of order. White power in a bag it certainly coke! Now you’ve asked the kids they now know it’s there father. Kick him out or leave because take it from someone who come out of it worse time of my life ! Good luck x

[Freeforever]

Hi I can totally relate to your post I also own a house with my ex I have recently left! I have been fighting for years about his drug addiction falling asleep on the sofa so we’re all on egg shells until he rises .. my daughter also didn’t want to bring friends round because she was embarrassed. I also paid all te bills, one morning I arrange to leave and find somewhere else to live it was so hard leaving my home and all the things I had brought but in the end my and my daughter happiness was worth so much more. I will start again and as for the house he won’t be able to afford to keep it Over his head so sooner or later I will get what’s mine until then I will find a permanent place to live and take each step at a time . It’s very hard I won’t lie to you and you definitely do have some dark days but in the end i know it will be worth it .. living on egg shells or trying to please the un please-able is draining we all have our day and I reached mine just like one day you will reach yours good luck xx

[Freeforever]

Hey, I have recently left my abusive ex he won’t leave so me and my child have had to go every time I see the Christmas adverts on it’s giving me massive anxiety! I just think like this it’s okie one day of the year and it will be over .. we have had some good Christmas over the years we was together but the last 3 have been awful so to be honest I’m kind of happy we won’t be spending it together. Hopefully you can spend the day with family or a friend for support but spent the day with people who love and respect you me time .. good luck ! Xx

[Freeforever]

Hello, I have recently left my partner who was nasty abusive and a addict ! We was together for nearly 2 decades I always thought it wasn’t as bad as some people out there. My final straw was (detail removed by Moderator) when he accuse me of talking to other people and assaulted me for it! I packed up my things and my daughters it was the hardest thing I have ever done! I have a safe place to stay and I’m thankful for that . Unfortunately we own a home together so there so much more difficult times ahead. Just take each hour as it comes and try not to overthink about the future.. your now safe ! I keep getting the abusive message and I try to only reply with short straight messages try not to get sucked in to his manipulation or talking down his horrible actions .. find a good book to read about abusive partners it will help you realise it’s not you who’s the problem. Good luck you’ve come so far already by leaving which is a massive achievement!!

[Freeforever]

Hey, thank you for taking the time to reply. Your advice is so helpful.. I do agree you cannot change him I need to change my way on the approach.. or question how can he treat me like this if he loves me. We have been together for a very long time with 2 children one has already left because was sick of his demands, which really hurts .. he even once said (detail removed by moderator) .. how evil. Anyway I am definitely going to download the book you recommended a few has suggested it. Thanks again x

[Freeforever]

I am also still living with my abuser and not strong to leave my home which we own, I myself are looking to try therapy to repair my sanity and learn tactics to over power him without reacting to his vile gib. I need to heal me before I am strong enough to set out a future plan.. I have also made plans with friends and get on with my own life doing things I would normally ask for his approval so I’m slowly taking back my life. Good luck

[Freeforever]

Hi I wanted to point out I have had this similar treatment blaming past about there current ways , also have you heard of Sarah’s law where you can contact the police for any previous violence records they may hold. Just a thought.. I have a partner who blames the abuse he received in his childhood yet sits and be the same in front of our daughter , myself I think it’s just a escape from there own blame, I hope your doing ok .. reach out to friends and family .. good luck

[Freeforever]

Hi I’m new to here, I wanted to drop a comment on this post and the point you mention.. I do not love my partner nomore I do however love my home we have literally build ! That’s what keeps me and my daughter as part of me thinks why should I go ? Lately I have been standing up for myself more not even caring of the terrible fights it starts.. how can you love someone who treats you so mean.. or how could they love you to treat you so mean..? Then after the abuse they apologise and your meant to just accept it and move on. If your not smiling be questioned what’s wrong? I actually wish my partner would die. Harsh yeah I agree but I feel so trapped !

[Freeforever]

Hi watersprite, thank you for your great advice it all sounds so true.. I am making excuses.. it’s like when we do have a bust up and he assaults me he plays it down like oh just a little push or pull.. if he apologies the following day he’s like (detail removed by moderator). Like I’m meant to all smiling when I’m being treated like This. The guilt I feel towards my saucy is more hurtful and upsetting than what I’m going though. I need a exit plan and unfortunately I cannot just up and go .. I run a business have people who rely on me to get up and show up.. so it’s so tough facing the world with all this on my shoulders.

[Freeforever]

Hey, thank you for your reply. I’m sorry to hear about your same situation. Stay strong.. I am normally quite strong willed myself but recently I have struggled. Yes my daughter is finally seeing him for what he is.. yet I feel guilty for allowing her to feel this way.. so stuck I am always honest with her about certain things because I don’t want her to grow up into thinking men can treat you this way. Where currently in the house of silence which is hard but easier than fighting I suppose, I’m just trying to not bite at his barks

[Freeforever]

Hi I’m new to hear trapped in a home me and vile partner owns.. it’s so hard when people think you can just get up and leave.. it’s not that simple and then your in a tough war with your own sanity .. I deserve better I shouldn’t be leaving ! Selfish men only stay so they can control you even more inside your home. Stay strong .. we’ve took the first big step by reaching out for support.

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