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    • #6773
      Ladyface
      Participant

      Trust…it’s one I struggle with…

      My ex cheated on me with my best friend…and on sex dating sites…he was emotionless…like when my step dad was dying of cancer …it was all about him his mother told me his other women were my fault! ….Trust my dear is earnt…but for us accepting it..is a completely different ball game…sometimes people say I love u…and I look and think..but do u? Are u sure? Why do you…there’s nothing to love! It’s stopping myself and saying hang on a min that’s his mind speaking not mine! Making me question myself and others and my god trust is hard…

      You will do everything when you are ready….I suffered with panic attacks and phobias and one by one as I healed they started to go….I wouldn’t even use the dishwasher as I was frightened it would catch fire and I couldn’t deal with it…because he’d made me feel useless…but you will do them…just say…give me space and time to grow and heal…I will then conquer each one in turn….like last week I quad biked up a volcano (removed by moderator)!

      You can do this…you can heal and you will be happy…x

    • #6771
      Ladyface
      Participant

      Tamar

      I’ve been gone a few years….but I’m still suffering the effects …I.e low self worth…snapping people up…major trust issues can’t take compliments the list goes on…

      The anxiety is the worst ….when people go quiet I’m thinking it’s going to blow or something I’ve done wrong or its my fault…I’m sorry is a frequent words used…

      It took months for me to stop apologizing

      U will find that happiness and love….I promise u…although I found it as scary as hell….my partner New somehow that he had to play everything gently as I wouldn’t accept anything…like help…he started by fixing the toilet…lol…he said I knew up wouldn’t have it….so I just thought gently gently…he has the patience of a saint to deal with me and my ten tun of issues….I still get extremely anxious and scared at times…I find the phrase I’m free helps.

      X

    • #6766
      Ladyface
      Participant

      Unfortunately relationships like this leave us paranoid, not only about other people but about ourselves ….we doubt ourselves so much…sometimes I sit there and think what’s happened to me….when did I become such a shadow….

      Lucky enough…I’m getting on the right path now…but at times I’m still battling this massive anxiety paranoid eggshell ball of nastiness….

      Lucky my partner understands but it’s so hard…on everyone…

      Keep strong…Keep looking forward … Remember your waiting for yr earth heaven to catch up x x lots of love

    • #6764
      Ladyface
      Participant

      Hello flower ready to bloom

      I understand completely, I lived years with someone who constantly blamed me for everything, his actions his temper.

      I left a few years ago, everyone said go back to him. But I was determined that me and my son would not live a life of misery and control. I would say I’m not going back…I will never go back…I’m free…..I had everyone saying u silly girl go back….but I refused…

      Keep strong believe in yourself…I no its hard but you have strength keep going..

      It gets easier x

      Big hugs and love x

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