Maggie

[Maggie]

Hello pixiedust,
You have made the first step in realising whats hes doing, its hard no to feel down and alone, your not alone you have all of us to talk to, speak to womens aid they are lovely they offer tea, a hug and all the support you could ever dream of to get you on the road to recovery, but dont stay because it will get worse, i hope you are ok thinking of you x

[Maggie]

Hi mixed up mum,
I so completely get where your coming from, dont beat yourself up, you have gone from a controlling relationship and your just rebelling, nothing wrong in that we have all done that, theres no hard and fast rules, i kinda live each day as it comes, as for the lie ins serenity is right you dont realise how physically and emotionally drained you are and how much rest you need to recover. Xx

[Maggie]

Hi confused 123,
My experiences with a dating site as not been good thats were i met my abusive husband from, im not sure i would ever go back on such a site, in reality they can be whoever, do whatever, and say whatever, its a picture and a write up be very safe, on most of the sites the guys are just interested in casual sex no strings, my experience was bad but i guess not everyones will be the same xx

[Maggie]

Hi
I hope it helps, the police were lovely despite having to break some really bad news, i have even had follow up calls. I strongly advise using this it isnt a gut feeling anymore and the fact people believe you stops you feeling like your going mad xx

[Maggie]

Hi,
For me it was the turning point, a reality check, my husband family are all hard working they are intolerant of his behaviour, his only back bone is his mother who supports him regardless, despite how the family or her husband feel.

I hope you are ok and safe x

[Maggie]

Thank you serenity x

[Maggie]

Hello,
I listened and yes its the kinda song that would make you get up to face another day x

[Maggie]

I have taken your advice tamra and checked melanie tonia evans out her words really do run true, i have no intention on speaking to him or seeing him for me this really is the end xx

[Maggie]

Yes i think its just the adjusting from us to just me and its kinda living with the unknown at the minute, but the suppirt from the site is fab x

[Maggie]

Hi all.
Im feeling very lonely and confused, it was my choice to end the relationship, my life had changed so much, i wasnt allowed to go out, contact with family and friends, a phone or lap top, i could only work hours around him, he controlled my job via texts demanding me home, he bought plain underwear for me to wear when i was in work, i wasnt allowed to wear anything but his shirt in the house, wasnt allowed to have a bath on my own, go to bed on my own, if i did it was to try and defuse a arguement he would come into the bedroom and rip all the clothes off me leaving
Me naked on the bed for up to an hour(i wasnt allowed clothes in bed), meal times were so difficult, i would plate our food if he did actually come into the kitchen he would take half of my food off my plate telling me i was a fat c..t, every day he would call me a fat c..t or ugly c..t, i would be in tears, degraded, humiliated, other meal times consisted of him sitting on the sofa,i would be expected to take his meal to him, his cutlery abd juice, again when i sat next to him with a meal the usual comments would happen, despite my meals being considerably less, the violence was awful, he had me pinned to the floor as he attempted to strangle me, he would spit in my face, hold my face so tight i would have thick lips and bruises, he would raise his hand arm quickly to frighten me it was like living on eggshells, i would wake up to him screaming in my face, cold water over me and so much more, my emotions were on a constant rollacoaster one minute he would be telling me he loved me the next he hated me, back in october i attempted to take my own life i couldnt cope anymore it was my only way out of the bullying, the name calling and contant threats of hurting me, i also suffered massive finance loss, he would constantly be searching web site for cars, vans, tools, but he had no money in the past year he had only worked for 3months, but his demands for items were huge and if i didnt give in his moods were awful, he lost his job so many times through his anger and inabilty to be social to other people, my biggest regret was my lack of contact from my two children his jealousy was hard to handle he refered to my son a spoiled bas…..d and my daughter a scanky bitch, i wasnt allowed contact with them they werent allowed in the house, i got to the point where i didnt allow the children in the house i was frighten an argument would arise and he would hit them. I ensured i maintained contact but i would have to delete phone calls and texts as he checked my phone daily. I lost complete control ending up not knowing we i was, its been three weeks since he left we have had contact via text, but on both occasions he was hard showing no emotions, xmas eve the texts started at 9am he was awful i cried all day but i guess thats wanted he wanted to achieve,i know hes come to the house he was seen and i know hes tried to scare me by playimg games the windows which i now were closed were open when i got home, despite me changing the locks on the doors, life is really lonely im thankful for my children and my dogs but why do i miss him and cant stop crying xx
Sorry its a long post x

[Maggie]

Serenity, Tamra
I have read your mail over and over, i drove back home from my daughters last night, crying all the way, feeling how you explained, questioning myself, should i have taken more blame, did the things really happen or was it my mind. But over the last couple of days i had put pen to paper and from day one i wrote down everything he had said or done to me, a really difficult thing to do, so when i got home i read it, to remind myself the loneliness is better than the fear i lived on a daily basis.
Thank you Maggie x

[Maggie]

Thank you tamra i will google and read up x

[Maggie]

Thank you so much, im lucky i have my two children back in my life and they have been my rock in the last three weeks but i need to make friends talk to similar minded people, at (age removed  by moderator) im not sure how i do that x

[Maggie]

Hi im new to the site, i to am finding it really difficult, the loneliness is endless, i separated from my husband (details removed by moderator) ago my relationship i believe was based on lies and manipulation, i can relate to physical and emotional abuse, name calling, mind games. Constant attention seeking isolating me from family, my children, controlling my work, my phone, what i ate, what i wore, who i spoke to, why is it i cant stop crying i miss him so much but i know he will never change it as been the worse xmas i received awful texts off him xmas eve. So upsetting x

[Maggie]

Its really hard it makes you realise you are even more isolated and even harder when you really dont have to convince the people because they know what hes like but for whatever reason they belive him listen to him and support him x

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