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    • #97012
      PRETTYWOMAN
      Participant

      Hello everyone thank you for your messages much appreciated….I have been with the Police on the (detail removed by moderator) they then said they couldnt help with Immediate refuge and I would have had to go to the streets. My daughter who wants nothing to do with me because of all the trouble HE caused I went to her for (detail removed by moderator), she then used the (detail removed) Hospital as an excuse to get rid of me, I ended up there for about a week, all they did was take blood pressure and then they contacted the council, they then put me up in the (detail removed) and then from there I had to go to the council themselves, they sent me to two refuge places that was awful…as I said this trauma has rendered me not to be able to cook for myself….while in my room there was a communal kitchen where I could cook if I wanted to but I had no money or food I was starving, this was on Christmas day…I had to contact him to rescue me he did…but only because I am his muse….I dont want this happening again. I contacted Woman’s aid and all they said was that they would send me again to the place in (detail removed) that was awful…communal shower where there are men, cant take pj’s into shower and its situated in the hall way, the only thing u can take into the shower is a towel…they also only put the heating on a 4pm the place was a nightmare.

    • #96642
      PRETTYWOMAN
      Participant

      diymum@1 thank you again for your message….I can’t, I live with him and I suffer from agoraphobia he would have to post all my letters and whatever they need. Can you imagine him posting my divorce letters to my solicitor?
      They ask for original bank statements etc. I cant use his printer as he has his office upstairs and my laptop is downstairs.

    • #96474
      PRETTYWOMAN
      Participant

      Hello diymum@1

      Thank you for your response, I would do anything to get him out the house but how? I can’t even concentrate on liaising with a solicitor, besides I would need to get legal aid first, and I did that trying to divorce him, eventually the trauma was so great that I could not even get that done, my memory failed me everytime Legal aid asked me what certain payments were for into my bank accounts, I could not remember these payments and what they were for. It was extremely scary. I did not want to lie to them about where these payments came from or who they came from.
      When he deserted me, I was without work, and money I had to sell a lot of household items when a payment came into my bank account it was not exactly itemised what it was for. Legal aid for a divorce can take time and 6 months down the line I had by then forgotten who paid me for what? Also we tried to reconcile, at the time of the divorce taking place, he insisted that I pull back the divorce. Foolishly I went back to him, and I told my solicitor if I was to carry on with the divorce, how on earth would I be able to attend court hearings as my mental capacity is not good and I cannot drive, he would have to take me to the court hearing…yeah right. (detail removed by moderator)….guess what?

      Do you really seriously think he would take me to a court hearing when you sleeping with the enemy?

    • #96374
      PRETTYWOMAN
      Participant

      Lisa NO PANIC Helpline
      0844 967 4848

      *Everyday 10am-10pm. Calls Charged at 5ppm + access charge

      ouch with someone with no money

    • #96363
      PRETTYWOMAN
      Participant

      Question: When going into a refuge what do you take with you?

    • #96359
      PRETTYWOMAN
      Participant

      How does a person live with a man who shouts at you everytime he speaks to you ((removed by moderator) of constant shouting when you going through a mental breakdown) and also tells you “I hate you with a passion” and “you ugly f*** c**nt insults you all day long, belittles everything you do or say, argues over petty things and then cooks for you and you sit opposite him and he insists on asking “(removed by moderator)” waiting for me to say anything and heaven forbid if I criticise the food. Shouts at you if you put the heating on. Runs your whole family down. You see memories of when things were good all around you. Tells you to choose between him or your children and grandchildren, calls them scrotes and b****s**d everyday all day long most mornings he’s here. Talks to neighbours and tells you he has told them why he is being nasty to you

    • #96357
      PRETTYWOMAN
      Participant

      diymum@1 Thank you for your concern and message.
      Wishful thinking getting an advocate from Woman’s Aid.
      Fighting him while I am living with him? No chance, he will give me all the hell under the sun. Been in a self-contained flat will be a problemmy trauma, anxiety has left me unable to cook for myself, when once I was a wizard in the kitchen
      Its even a struggle to get to GP (removed by moderator).
      Im new in the area and he makes sure he only uses UBER (he only uses them for every (removed by moderator), he’s never done this before, this is a new stunt) I must make sure I dont use them as he has befriended the local uber drivers. I have to find another taxi service and alot have bad reviews. Not even pitching, can you imagine having a GP appointment and they dont pitch?

    • #96347
      PRETTYWOMAN
      Participant

      Diymum@1 thank you too for your reply. We moved to a new area, I have not even registered with a GP yet.
      He is extremely controlling, and yes I feel like I am going crazy.

    • #96346
      PRETTYWOMAN
      Participant

      Hello Queenmaeve, thank you for your reply.
      I have not contacted the Samaritans yet. I would think they the same as Woman’s Aid?
      Do they do the same thing as Woman’s Aid?
      Cant touch my phone while he’s in the house cant talk, even when I text someone he freaks out and
      shouts at me “(removed by moderator)”
      I know I need to be seen by a GP but he wont take me and I have no money.

      Let me explain: he is self employed and comes and goes when he likes, so its very difficult to
      contact Samaritans or anyone as I never know when he will be out or home. I am not allowed to ask any
      questions about his comings or goings. He is extremely inconsistent. Yesterday he went out early in the morning
      then suddenly he was home at around (removed by moderator) then he left and I was actually on the phone to Woman’s Aid when he just walked in. That was extremely tricky

    • #96309
      PRETTYWOMAN
      Participant

      Lisa….thank you but how can they help me?

      No Panic on 0844 967 4848 are a support service you can call (10 am – 10 pm daily). Supportline are perhaps another option for emotional support. You can call them on 01708 765 200. They also have an online/email support service.

      What is Supportline’s email or online service please? This man watches me like a hawk

    • #96308
      PRETTYWOMAN
      Participant

      He owes people money I get an email in my spam box from these people, I asked him why am I getting an email from them
      the same morning he got a letter in the post redirected from old addy to new one. I contacted the company and asked them if they could remove my email addy…I mentioned to him that I contacted them (should not have) today he asks me if I gave his mobile number to them as he suddenly got a call from them…I tell him “No I didn’t” back via text.
      He walks in and asks me again – I said to him “I answered you via text read your text msg” he shouts
      Tell me to my face you didnt give them my number.

      Cooking still hasn’t started not even the plum sauce which he insists on. Raising my anxiety levels one notch higher.

      Lisa thank you for your message…I will try those numbers when he isn’t around.
      He told me last night he was not going to be home tonight and was sleeping out. He constantly moves the goal posts and is extremely inconsistent with me. I was going to make my escape tonight. But now he is home for the night, its very difficult to plan anything with him. He also said he was going away for 2 weeks in Dec. He didnt go.

    • #96305
      PRETTYWOMAN
      Participant

      Hello Queenmaeve, no he has not been hitting me, he just like pushes me around, I’ve lost (removed by moderator) and am very small and weak. He is extremely intimidating and shouts on the top of his voice, when he cooks he slams the kitchen doors closed (removed by moderator). I have spoken to Police they can only detain him for the night then he is back to this house and I am trapped here…so what does that help me? He will give me more hell.

      (removed by moderator) night he pulled on me to shove me out the house…I had nowhere to go and you know how freezing it is outside.
      (removed by moderator)

    • #96303
      PRETTYWOMAN
      Participant

      (Detail removed by moderator)
      so that I can regulate our heating in this house as it is extremely boiling (removed by moderator)I need to keep the heat on downstairs and in turn it makes upstairs even hotter.
      He has sabotaged the heating in this house he controls it via an app Im sure.
      (Detail removed by moderator)
      I am about to crack by this man!!! I freeze in this house downstairs, and upstairs it’s boiling hot.

    • #96298
      PRETTYWOMAN
      Participant

      I am so dizzy I can’t think straight, most of the time it feels like I have had
      2 bottles of wine, when in fact I have not, this is why I cannot perform a “simple task” 🙁
      Is it the anxiety or lack of sleep? I cannot sleep and Im never hungry.

      I did research and they say when you traumatised, have
      anxiety and under major stress one cannot even perform “simple tasks” or am I going mad?
      Even both my ears buzz and sounds like a lawnmower. When I sit for say 5 min and get up Im dizzy.
      I need to pace the floor

    • #96295
      PRETTYWOMAN
      Participant

      Earlier I mentioned in my first post I am not able to cook, the fear and trauma has blocked this ability as he belittles every move I make. (removed by moderator). He is now out and will be back to see how I (removed by moderator).

      I have a (removed by moderator) which takes 25-30min to cook in a preheated oven.
      (detail removed by moderator)
      This does sound nuts I know, but to me “timing’ is very important.

      This is so embarrassing 🙁
      I could make you anything (removed by moderator) ago:-( I was a kitchen wizard before all this.

Viewing 14 reply threads

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