Stargazing1

[Stargazing1]

Apparently he wants me to buy a vibrator . Unfortunately I don’t like things like that .

[Stargazing1]

This person has been married twice before me . They both walked out on him . ???????

[Stargazing1]

My other half thinks my life with him is the best I’ve had. I’m now feeling guilty for venting .

[Stargazing1]

@ lover of no contact , it is better when there are people who understand. All the best 👍. Thank you again.

[Stargazing1]

Thank you so much for your support @lover of no contact, I’m very grateful of you kindness and time. What you have posted will hopefully sink into my mind because I’ve been battling with myself so much . Well done on your success in speaking out . Your an absolute diamond 💎. I can’t thank you enough but I am so truly truly grateful 💖. Please take care of yourself. Sending hugs.

[Stargazing1]

I’m actually feeling like a real bad person @Reallyconfused . My other half has been in the calm stage for a little bit. There was a few bolshy comments from him the other day . I had a bit of a conversation with my son a few days ago and he said some things sound like gas lighting. God I’m so stupid. I’m sorry my reply seems all over the place . My head is all over the place . I am pleased you found the books and they have been helpful. I’m sorry I’m so full of woe despite being told it is verbal and emotional abuse I’m struggling to get my head around it especially now the period is calm . I keep beating myself up thinking I did something wrong by getting in touch with womens aid . Part of me just wants to blurt it put in front of him but I know that would be wrong . Can you help me understand why I’m feeling so bad about talking too them it’s OK if not . Thank you so much for your kindness and support and time. I appreciate more than you will ever know. Please take care of yourself and please keep yourself safe . Kind regards

[Stargazing1]

I’ve only just seen this @swanlake my sincere apologies. Thank you for the facts that you have pointed out too me . That’s interesting to know that others experience the same issues. If I’m honest I’m quite introvert I am not very sociable if I’m truly honest with myself. I’m sorry I’m so introvert. If I’m honest I’d like to live further away from where I am but I’ve no idea where to start . My sincere apologies for my weaknesses
. Your kindness means much more than you will ever know ❤️. Thank you.

[Stargazing1]

Really glad you far in you recovery @Texas . It’s good to hear how people have managed to move away from their horrible partners and their terrifying life . I so happy you managed to get away from that turmoil. I wish nothing but the best for you . It takes strength to get away from these situations so I hope your proud of yourself. Take care.

[Stargazing1]

I’m sorry if I’ve said this before I apologise unreservedly. I’ve been thinking long and hard and I am 100 percent sure that my other half is not at fault it’s me that’s caused all the aggro . I’m a coward who can’t speak and say things for fear of hurting people’s feelings and because of this I’ve caused problems within the relationship so now I know who’s fault it is . It’s mine no one else’s. I’m truly sorry to each and every single one of you. I’m so truly truly sorry.

[Stargazing1]

@Needtoclarify , I apologise for a late response. I appreciate your kind and understanding ❤️ it really is appreciated.

[Stargazing1]

How do we keep up the pretending . Its hard work keeping up the pretending. There was no apology for my son either. No apology to me a few weeks ago. No apology to my son . My son was shocked that there was no apology. Why do people feel that its ok to behave the way they do ? Why do they never apologise? How can they think it’s OK ?

[Stargazing1]

Thank you @Sungirl , I am so sorry to hear about your mental health. Your right it does effect our mental health a great deal . Sending gentle hugs to you 🤗 ❤️. I will try to focus on myself as best I can . I don’t think I have heard of grey rock . Thank you so much for your kindness and support and time it’s appreciated a great deal. Please keep taking care of yourself. Sending hugs again 🤗.

[Stargazing1]

I feel like I just want to use him now until the time is right. He’s verbally and emotionally abused me on and off for years and all I want to do now is use him as a crutch until I’m stronger. I know this sounds really bad of me but they don’t change do they .

[Stargazing1]

@Butterfly-A, I hope you can find that strength and go . I wish you nothing but the very best in life . Take the chance. Sending lots of special hugs .

[Stargazing1]

The person who I spoke too said it is abuse .

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