Hi Redtulip,
You’re not alone in your experiences. It can take time to recover from domestic abuse and many women develop PTSD from the trauma. I’m glad that you’ve found this forum for support and are reaching out elsewhere to access help to work through everything.
You could speak to your GP about what you’re experiencing and ask for a referral for mental health treatment. Some local domestic abuse services offer counselling, you can search for your local service using our service directory. IAPT is an NHS service where you can self-refer for psychological therapies, you can search on the NHS website for services in your area.
You may also like to search for a counsellor on the British Association of Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP) website or using Counselling Directory. Many counsellors use a sliding scale for their fees to try and make their services accessible to as wide a range of people as possible.
Unfortunately, there is often a waiting list for accessing counselling, even if it seems very long, it could be worth getting yourself on the list so that you know you will have access eventually. There are some online courses focused on healing from trauma on the Bloom website which could be something to work with while waiting for face-to-face counselling.
Take care and keep posting,
Lisa