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Im about ready to throw in the towel. He has been evil so nasty as ive not been home much due to being with a sick relative. I broke down asked my mum who i dont get on with as she is as n word and my husband but I was deslerate I asked her if I could stay at hers and she said no. Go home face him stand up to him.
Nice eh?!!!!
Aick relative has now improved so I am home more and guess what, husband has been nice. I lost it told him just how evil he has been how i cant cope anymore he shouted at me then its as if ive said nothing just back to normal.
Im sick of being picked up hugged then drop kicked back to the ground im sick of this life my life but yet i cant get away.
Feels like theres no answer no hooe no way out. -
Numbumblebee I understand fully how you feel. We were away at the weekend with kids and his family. Litterally as soon as we arrived his attitude was terrible the way he spoke to me was herrendous. I ofcourse asked him why he was being like this he said it was my fault I show him no love I was crying in public toilets. Yet again he wants me to give but give nothing but abuse in return. I was thinking to myself the whole weekend how the f**k did I allow myself to get here two beautiful kids trying to have a good time and the rotten apple is ruining it. We should all have been having a good time. We arrives home yesterday and like a switch he’s back to normal I asked him why on earth he did this and was miserable the whole time he said he’s didn’t know and can I please get off his back!!! So I understand so much when you have got to go with whatever mood they r in. I’m fed up with this life all I done all weekend was look around at people smiling laughing inside a wanted to run away. I need out to hunni more than ever. Will I ever be strong enough? I hope so but it’s taking every ounce of my happiness away being where I am just now. I hope together we can do this big hugs x*x
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Sadly @Better-days I know this one well it hurts so much and we drive ourselves crazy by asking why all the time. My heart goes out to you.
I talked to my husband told him how he made me feel he shouted alot asked me what i wanted to do i said i didnt know. Then after q couple of hours its been forgotten by him and he says i am punishing him by not having sex.
Now he is all back to normal.
How how can they do this?I like you need to leave. But i just cant.
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And it goes on. He turned up at my sick relatives house he knew i would be there he never ever goes to visit them. He questioned everything i told him about being at the hospital as if i was lying then my mum said to him (detail removed by moderator)
I was livid. I feel suffocated like he is folllowing me again.
I am so full of hate for him i am shocking myself. -
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Thank you BB and betterdays.
Trouble is Im done.
I give up I cant keep fighting I cant see a way out and never will. Im sorry to be such a downer I hate being this way but right now he has won. I just dont wanna do this be here anymore.-
Remember that dream – you sitting quietly drinking a cup of tea? You deserve that, whether it’s with him or not you deserve peace. Why does he get to live how he wants but you don’t? Remember too, today might be a bad one but just like the weather, it’s stormy now but the sun will shine again. Hang in there x
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@nbumblebee please don’t stop fighting for your rights to a peaceful life you’ve come so very far. He’s temporarily got to you but you will find yourself back on your feet and in no time stronger than you realise just now.
You’re a survivor and you’re amazing I know as we have been going through this together at a similar pace wth similar situation and marriages.
We are all here for you.
You are welcome to message me if it helps as as you sound very upset.
It’s natural how you are feeling but you do have the control n your hands, he’s showing himself again and you can seek support wherever you feel most comfortable.
You have us here, women’s aid, your counsellor and m sure if you think about it there are other people who are willing to help you with this.
Big hugs to you nbumblebee x*x
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Thanks to you both its just so hard I now feel like the bad guy he is complaining that I dont hug but when i try it ends up in a grope all the time its about sex and i just feel so worthless.
He can say whatever he likes however nasty but then im to forget it lay down and have sex.
I mean nothing to him and it hurts so much to realise that.
I mean nothing to anyone it seems im just here for them. And actually i dont want to be anymore i really dont. X -
So sorry you’re having an extra tough time with things. Wanted to share and say I get the complaints about “not being wanted” too. I try and explain that everything that happens between us keeps mounting up in my head and the pile of things gets bigger and I can’t climb over it and forget it all. It’s formed a massive barrier as it just does not go together, being affectionate with someone who is shouting at you the next minute, upsetting you and not giving a toss. I don’t want to do anything physical really and haven’t for months but it happened the other day as I thought nothing is going to change unless I make an effort but my heart is really not in it.
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Sorry I need to just add another rant. I saw my counsellor who says its now time to plan to talk to womans aid to find advice on fianances a place to go etc. I was determined when i left her that this was it. I came home and he has for the first time ever booked a suprise few days away.
Now what do I do? I cant go behind his back plan my future not now he is trying. I just want out why is it so b****y hard?
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