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Hi, I’m new here. Finally found the strength to leave my controlling and possesive ex (timeframe removed by Moderator). I’ve gone no contact and he’s tried every window of opportunity to get in touch, I’ve had (number removed by Moderator) friend requests, he’s been trying to get his friends to add my Facebook to spy on me, he’s been saying to my friends the reason is so toxic is because “(line of communication removed by Moderator)” it got to the stage where if I wore makeup he’d be angry about other men looking at me, he first demanded to go through my phone within weeks of being together, said “(line of communication removed by Moderator)” I feel like I’ve just wasted (timeframe removed by Moderator) years of my life. I had him arrested (timeframe removed by Moderator) for stalking and spying on me through my window. (legal detail removed by Moderator). I wish I never met him, despite all of this I feel crazy to say I still have feelings for him as he had such a sweet. Loving and sensitive side. I’m struggling to come to terms with the fact it was all a trap and a lie
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Hi rosequartz1986,
It sounds like you’ve been going through a really frightening time lately. How you’re feeling, struggling to reconcile the abuse that you’ve experienced with the loving and attentive behaviour, is very common. Hopefully some of the other women will be able to post and share with you soon, but if you read through other posts you’ll see this is something that is discussed often.
You might find the resources on the Bloom website helpful in your healing journey. If you’re not already in touch with your local domestic abuse service, you could reach out to them for some ongoing, specialist support.
Take care and keep posting,
Lisa -
Hi rosequartz1986
It takes so much strength and courage to leave, and you have done it. I am new here too and I have just left my ex who was also extremely jealous and possessive, I feel the struggle of coming to terms with it, and it all feels so confusing.
Im starting to understand and recognise from speaking to others the extent of the abuse and that feels very painful, and real, but necessary.
With peer support and even professional support we will get through this. We are not alone.
Take care
Lost comet
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