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Hi All.
I was in a relationship with my ex partner for (timeframe removed by Moderator) years there in (date removed by Moderator) who went on to be my fiancé, but now my ex fiancé.
Our (timeframe removed by Moderator) years together was amazing and wonderful, and after (timeframe removed by Moderator), he changed towards me, by wanting me to give up everything, before we got married, and because I did not, he broke it off (detail removed by Moderator) times, and to top it off one night exactly (timeframe removed by Moderator) he left me on my own, to make my own way home.
I blame myself, because each time he said sorry. I went back.
Well not this time.
Hayley-15
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Hi Hayley-15,
I’m sorry that he treated you like this and hurt you so much. It’s not your fault that you believed he was sorry and went back. You were treating the apologies like they were genuine and included a promise to change his behaviour. That’s a normal thing that anyone in your situation would have done and it’s exactly why abusers use apologies in this way. Try to be kind to yourself. The important thing is that you’ve broken free of that cycle now and can see his behaviour for the abuse that it was. You may find the resources on the Bloom website helpful in processing and healing what you’ve been through.
Take care and keep posting,
Lisa -
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all of us are annoyed with how long we stayed, how many chances we gave, but we cannot blame ourselves. The more you read up and learn the more you will understand and be at peace. I am finding using chatgpt to summerize everything that has happened great, it is actually super validating and helpful atm xx
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