Is this abuse? Post seperation

Hello,

Ive been split from my son (detail removed by Moderator) dad for (time frame removed by Moderator). Our relationship was toxic, coercive and control. The verbal abuse never stopped. If anyone has upset him / angered him 99% of the time I get the brunt for something small ( letting our son nap when he was younger mainly!)

However (time frame removed by Moderator) he had another child and another failed relationship. Since then his dad has made sure he has regular contact and check ins on his other child and dips quite heavily on our son. He’s now moved (detail removed by Moderator) so has neither child overnight and is meant to have them both (detail removed by Moderator). If a friend invites him to the pub when he’s due to have our son he will try and maneuver his time with him.

Supposedly my son pulls at the door to leave when he’s with his dad. (information removed by Moderator)

It turns out he was trying to go down the pub to watch football (information removed by Moderator)

He was vile in his messages (detail remove by Moderator) I’ve shifted all contact to go via my Dad now but as he has no control over me any more I feel my son is getting the brunt of it.

Regardless of if it was ‘ one on one time’or the pub what’s my next steps? I can’t carry on like this. I’ve tried to speak to him, I’ve tried mediation but communication is only on his terms and he never turned up for mediation

Please help me because my anxiety is heightened after any situation like that 😔