Please get out:

Some interesting reading there. The trauma bond thing i have disasociated for years. Which is why im able to relay without emotion anything that has happened. Although i wouldnt say im trauma bonded its something that has helped me get through the worst of it.

The other stories are quite frightening. It makes you wonder what that tipping point is for some of them. How do they go from being abusive to murder because in effect they are giving up their own lives to end the womans.

It sounds like that was done to make the women take a step back. I wonder how many were actually prosecuted. He has been prosecuted before and if i make a statement i never back track. Its ironic for the worst stuff the police have never asked for a statement he would do something daft and i would get an officer who wants to. Plus if i got him arrested now he would make counter allegations and blatantly lie. Before he would own up. I dont even consider him going now unless its of his own accord. I used to all the time. Was yours prosecuted H A x

I wholeheartedly agree with everything you’ve said. I too was psychologically, physically, sexually and financially abused and got out. I have been out (detail removed by moderator), have a job a place to live and have just started dating again. It is possible, do not lose hope, ask for help!

That trauma bond link is very helpful, thank you for sharing. I’m out a few months but have regular contact with my husband as we have two very young children. It is extremely difficult 🙁

It’s the red mist that scares me. The way the double murderer seemed content. He did what had to be done. My ex denied his assault all the way and im certain watching me crumble in the witness box made it all worthwhile for him even with his conviction. They never let go either. My sister recently spent the day with her ex as their son got married. Even though they have been apart for many many years, his behaviour just reverted to type. Trying to boss her around. It doesn’t matter if they marry again, move away and lose contact for years. As soon as contact is re established, their abusive entitled attitude surfaces. Zero contact….

I’m convinced that I got out only just in time. My partner had tried suicide a few times in the past and would say scary things about suicide. He seemed to think that one day he would take his own life, was reconciled to it. On the day I escaped, he’d told me he would “stove my head in.” I managed to calm him down then I ran to the car and straight to the police to make a statement. He was arrested , charged. He killed himself while out on bail, in a particularly violent manner.
I’m sure he would have killed me first if he’d had the chance as he knew I’d finally had enough and was determined to separate. His violence would erupt when o tried to discuss separating. He really wasn’t ever going to let that happen.