When do I start to feel like me and come to terms with things?

You cant and shouldnt rush the healing process. A small dose of diazepan if the GP thinks its suitable. Also an elastic band on your wrist and everytime you think of him. Ping it. Another trick is to tell yourself you will do all the thinking about him between 6 and 7 at night. Put the thoughts away and tell yourself you will re visit them later. Usually by 6 oclock youve forgotten all about it. Take time to be nice to yourself. A hair cut, a massage, manicure. Keep treating yourself x

You can try paying privately for councelling or try your local rape crisis if its applicable. They run courses too. You local womens aid may know of charities that can help with councelling. Ive been drawn back in recently re the divorce. It causes anxiety initially but it does ease and the anxiety gets less and less x

HI HUn

REcovery comes at its own pace, i was the same when i left my ex i just wanted to fast forward all the pain , i was desperate for counselling but had to wait 5 months so im pleased u have to only wait 6 weeks which i know is still hard. OUr brain lets us process us as much as we can handle, i found there were different stages i went through, from denial , shock,trying to cry to accept what had happened, just getting on with life, trying to do no contact which was really long and disater for me , arranging child contact, dealing with nthe impact it has on kids, the list goes on, but through out this it was about learning to love myself again, having self respect for myself, discovering myself again and processing what happened. The cousnelling will help u loads and make u see things froma different prespective. When i satrted my counselling i wasnt even acknoweldging the abuse i experienced i just sat there saying feel like a failure of wife and well i cant cry cause thats his rule, i was lucky i had a good counsellor and she really made me see what happend to me , post as much as u need to , in one way its good u r having nightmares , get it out, at beginign i was so tired mentally and physcially i was just knocked out at night time

I think we’re probably at similar stages Positive.
I’m on the waiting list for counselling and my divorce papers have just landed with my ex.
This past couple of weeks have been an uphill struggle emotionally and physically (stress playing havoc with sleep, causing eczema and hair thinning) but these are things that help me:

Accepting that emotional recovery is a process with forward and backwards steps.

Setting personal goals to make progress and achievements with my hobbies (hobbies that I neglected for a long time due to exes castigations).

Taking small walks to get fresh air and some sun on my face.

Accepting social invitations even if it’s ‘not my thing’.

Doing something nice for someone else.

In the times when I’m so bogged down and seized up with stress and anxiety, I try to keep myself occupied with tasks that are easy on the mind: cleaning, hand sewing, even colouring books.

We can do nothing about our pasts, we can only influence our futures. What would you like yours to be Positive?

I was told that there was a 6-8 week waiting list for counselling, but I rang up
and told them how desperate I was and I was given a quicker appointment X

I have developed PTSD because I was refused counselling wherever I asked for help.
The NHS mental health service wants to convince me that marital rape is normal in the UK and the violence I experienced is nothing. They told me repeatedly to get on with it and just speak to friends when I feel low.