He's kept my children. He won't let me see them.

Full disclosure. I am in (detail removed by Moderator) so your laws are different. However, if you have a legal court order he can’t change it without going to court. If you have no legal order in place, see a lawyer right away. Find out what avenues you have to ensure you can get an agreement in place that is legal, on paper, and police enforceable. In addition, get clauses that prevent parental alienation on both sides. If you can’t agree you have to Duke it out in court unfortunately. In meantime document everything he does and says. Preferably he puts it in text or email so you can save it. Document every time you asked for access and it is denied. The only thing these types respond to is authority.

Hi

He does not have the authority to keep your children from you. Only a court can do that. He’s not in charge here. Get to a solicitor asap. Xx

@dragonfly – as far as Im aware, if he is on birth certificate and there is no order preventing contact from him then he can decide not to return them. You need to go to a solicitor asap and make an application to Court. If there is not actual evidence of him being abusive, the Court can have a fact finding hearing, which is when they hear from you both and decide basically who’s telling the truth. They don’t always do that though and most of the time parents will get some kind of contact. If you have been the primary carer for them and they are used to living with you, the Court will place a lot of value on that and likely agree they should return to you unless he can prove you are a risk to them. Get some legal advice asap as it really is something that can only be decided in Court. The court would take a dim view of him basically playing games and blackmailing you. Keep all messages.
Don’t just give in to what he’s asking as thats what he’s hoping for. Have you got a GP or someone you can talk to?
Try calling rights of women or the womens aid helpline can put you in touch with a solicitor for some advice. GOOD LUCK and dont give up xx

You could call the police on him for abducting your children because he cannot just keep them.

Unfortunately i don’t think the police can remove the children from a parent who has parental responsibility unless there are very serious concerns about their welfare. Its then up to the other parent to go to court asking for a child arrangement order/contact order to re-establish contact with the children, and the sooner this is done the better before it could be argued that the children are settled in the new arrangement (I think). I don’t know if you have a solicitor? Hope you can speak with a solicitor, you can contact your local domestic abuse advisory service for recommendations about solicitors that are experienced with domestic abuse issues such as this and also to get support from them. He doesn’t make sense that he is willing to agree to equal contact time between both of you when he claims that you are an abusive and unsafe parent. If those were my concerns I would not be agreeing to such contact because of those concerns, so it does look like he’s trying to bully you. Does he not think he will get equal contact time if he goes through the proper channels? When he says he will ‘take’ full custody he means he will withhold them from you, a typical abuser chant. I got ‘you will never see her again unless…’. I hope you can get legal advice and proceed quickly. xx

I agree with the others, you have to get to a solicitor immediately.

Have you ever contacted the police about him? Have his exes? Can you speak to any of them? Have you ever been in touch with Women’s Aid? Ever mentioned anything to the GP? Do you have any nasty texts or emails from him?

Make sure you read up on how abusers act. He’s obviously going to get nasty and you need to be prepared for him to throw anything at you to show what an awful mum you are.

It’s going to get messy but we are here and we’ve all been through our own experiences. We can all help.

Hi HUn

Get a solicitor fast to see where u stand and call womens of right advise line , i think if his on birtht certificate and has legal responsibility he can keep the children, i know this must be heart breaking to hear but would rather tell u the truth, my ex tried to keep my eldest son after contact and police couldnt do nothing as my son wouldnt speak up, it was just by chance he couldnt cope so my son was returned to me